i never knew how terrible it was to suddenly lose your loved ones .
a line the struck me hard in the movie, Confessions of Pain.
Saturday, December 30, 2006
i lost what i shouldnt have lost.
what exactly did you lose anyway?
is that really the case?
perhaps its something that should have been lost since long ago.
just that we had forced it to stay ours.
i thought i could do it.
but i realised that i couldnt.
it hurt too much.
i spend every single moment thinking of what i had lost,
and if i had made the right decision to do that.
it hurts so so so much.
but when i remember how much more you had hurt me,
i start to think that maybe i had made the right decision.
but still, it hurts that things had to come to this.
the next few days will be a test of my determination.
ytd was terrible for me. the acting, the laughing, the faking that everything was fine.
in a sense i feel a sort of release from this situation.
but it hurts that i had to lose such an important thing to me just to solve this problem.
i dont see anything wrong about disliking people.
afterall, we had never been good friends.
but so many people lash out at me,
and say that its wrong.
so i do what's right.
right for everybody,
but not for me.
i need the support and reassurance that i made the right choice.
for i am starting to doubt my decision.
my resolve might crumble any moment,
but i dont want to return to the life i used to live.
and that was to guess, and worry, and to feel neglected.
perhaps youre right. you dont deserve my concern.
but still,
i miss our friendship.
):
what exactly did you lose anyway?
is that really the case?
perhaps its something that should have been lost since long ago.
just that we had forced it to stay ours.
i thought i could do it.
but i realised that i couldnt.
it hurt too much.
i spend every single moment thinking of what i had lost,
and if i had made the right decision to do that.
it hurts so so so much.
but when i remember how much more you had hurt me,
i start to think that maybe i had made the right decision.
but still, it hurts that things had to come to this.
the next few days will be a test of my determination.
ytd was terrible for me. the acting, the laughing, the faking that everything was fine.
in a sense i feel a sort of release from this situation.
but it hurts that i had to lose such an important thing to me just to solve this problem.
i dont see anything wrong about disliking people.
afterall, we had never been good friends.
but so many people lash out at me,
and say that its wrong.
so i do what's right.
right for everybody,
but not for me.
i need the support and reassurance that i made the right choice.
for i am starting to doubt my decision.
my resolve might crumble any moment,
but i dont want to return to the life i used to live.
and that was to guess, and worry, and to feel neglected.
perhaps youre right. you dont deserve my concern.
but still,
i miss our friendship.
):
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
heartache.
that's all i can say.
im losing you, all of you.
and im told that my job is to not control it,
to let you all go.
it's something i have to learn to do.
and it's hard.
the pain it's causing me, it's unbearable.
im trying to do what's right.
'you feel right because you did something right,
you dont do something right just because you feel right.'
it's hurts so much.
that aching pain in your heart.
but i shall learn to control what i do.
'dont let your feelings control your actions.'
i wonder,
when i wasnt around,
did you all even wish that i was around?
there are so many questions that i wanna ask,
but somehow, i feel that isnt right for me to ask you anymore,
for you are no longer my close friend.
you're someone else's close friend now.
you talked through the night with her.
im not jealous, ive gone past that stage already.
its just that when i heard that that had happened,
i suddenly felt so distant from you.
like you were no longer my close friend.
i guess i was wrong to even treat you as my best friend.
whatever it is, perhaps its time for all of us to move on.
and you, i heard you singing that song with her.
guess its the same thing for you.
why has things come to this stage?
another clique is forming.
a clique that i detest.
but will have to accept no matter what.
because it is my job to compromise and let them make their own friends.
to not control them.
to just let go.
there are so many spiteful things that i can say.
and yet, i realise,
what for? why make yourself and the people around you miserable?
just contain the misery to yourself.
and then look for the shell station to pump it all out.
thanks shell station.
that's all i can say.
im losing you, all of you.
and im told that my job is to not control it,
to let you all go.
it's something i have to learn to do.
and it's hard.
the pain it's causing me, it's unbearable.
im trying to do what's right.
'you feel right because you did something right,
you dont do something right just because you feel right.'
it's hurts so much.
that aching pain in your heart.
but i shall learn to control what i do.
'dont let your feelings control your actions.'
i wonder,
when i wasnt around,
did you all even wish that i was around?
there are so many questions that i wanna ask,
but somehow, i feel that isnt right for me to ask you anymore,
for you are no longer my close friend.
you're someone else's close friend now.
you talked through the night with her.
im not jealous, ive gone past that stage already.
its just that when i heard that that had happened,
i suddenly felt so distant from you.
like you were no longer my close friend.
i guess i was wrong to even treat you as my best friend.
whatever it is, perhaps its time for all of us to move on.
and you, i heard you singing that song with her.
guess its the same thing for you.
why has things come to this stage?
another clique is forming.
a clique that i detest.
but will have to accept no matter what.
because it is my job to compromise and let them make their own friends.
to not control them.
to just let go.
there are so many spiteful things that i can say.
and yet, i realise,
what for? why make yourself and the people around you miserable?
just contain the misery to yourself.
and then look for the shell station to pump it all out.
thanks shell station.
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
the picture is still there. as my phone's mini wallpaper and as my msn display picture.
i wonder what happened to us. are we drifting apart?
or is it the introduction of new people?
it pains me to see us in this state.
and i hate it that i cant control my feelings.
i hate it that i always throw tantrums.
i dont want to. why havent i changed?
guess its not as easy as i thought it was.
**
xmas. it's something that never mattered to me.
but this year, it did. (:
recieved lotsa cards from people. yes, and some esp heartwarming messages from my close friends (:
xmas is a period of caring and sharing, yes and some people really touched my heart :D
carolling brought us all closer together in some way or another. and brought some of us apart. but still its an experience that i would never forget.
yes and the grand reunion was WOAH. as i was standing there with all the seniors and fellow choir mates. i really felt very warm and fuzzy inside. and i was really glad to be part of this big victoria family. and that sense of pride i felt when i was singing with everyone, its indescribable. the sound we produced, its like so heavenly and awe-inspiring. yes. its at times like these when i realise that i do love vj choir. (:
yes and i got to talk to a few year twos today. mainly weijie, jonathan gan and jeremy yeo. guess they're like the few year twos im relatively close to. got to hug them today yay! :D haha take care you guys and dont ever forget me alright! (:
**
RAH. i hate it when im made to be a big baddie or something.
argh.
shoo.
**
interesting new phrase:
im your shell station; refill your happiness.
thank you shell station :D
i wonder what happened to us. are we drifting apart?
or is it the introduction of new people?
it pains me to see us in this state.
and i hate it that i cant control my feelings.
i hate it that i always throw tantrums.
i dont want to. why havent i changed?
guess its not as easy as i thought it was.
**
xmas. it's something that never mattered to me.
but this year, it did. (:
recieved lotsa cards from people. yes, and some esp heartwarming messages from my close friends (:
xmas is a period of caring and sharing, yes and some people really touched my heart :D
carolling brought us all closer together in some way or another. and brought some of us apart. but still its an experience that i would never forget.
yes and the grand reunion was WOAH. as i was standing there with all the seniors and fellow choir mates. i really felt very warm and fuzzy inside. and i was really glad to be part of this big victoria family. and that sense of pride i felt when i was singing with everyone, its indescribable. the sound we produced, its like so heavenly and awe-inspiring. yes. its at times like these when i realise that i do love vj choir. (:
yes and i got to talk to a few year twos today. mainly weijie, jonathan gan and jeremy yeo. guess they're like the few year twos im relatively close to. got to hug them today yay! :D haha take care you guys and dont ever forget me alright! (:
**
RAH. i hate it when im made to be a big baddie or something.
argh.
shoo.
**
interesting new phrase:
im your shell station; refill your happiness.
thank you shell station :D
Saturday, December 23, 2006
have you ever felt like all the people that were important to you were slowly slipping away?
and that to their eyes you are just being unreasonable?
have you ever wondered how things could hurt so much that it scares you?
and how the people who hurt you so much could go on laughing?
have you ever felt heartache?
**
my comp's still screwed. writing in wordpad now. let's see if internet explorer will be nice to me. if you can see this in my blog, it means internet explorer was nice. lol.
today was a relatively fun day.
sops sounded better today, for some weird reason. we were more blended. yes and i was more on form, not as sucky as ytd. but i feel my voice going =/ probably because of the clam chowder?
yes the first session at ritz was quite soft. the sound was alright, but we were just plain soft. yeah the second session was much better. we sounded much louder and much more energetic :D yeah. except for the screwed up we wish you, i basically enjoyed myself during the second session. yes and a lot of seniors came back today. which was cool. it's been some time since ive seen such a big choir. not that we were very big, but it's just that its much bigger than the usual number. so during the third session, we were all blasting. about 1/4 into the third session, it started raining, and it was really ironic cos when the session started, i was thinking that we were lucky that it wasnt raining-.- yeah so we were moved into this small shelter. and so we werent as impressive. which was quite a sad thing cos we were really quite loud. ): i was hoping we would get more tips. lol. but whatever it is, it was fun :D
yes and i had fun talking to some of the seniors. its great to see some of my crapping partners again (: yes and i talked to some year3s, like just a bit of crap talk. was feeling quite happy about it cos hey its not everyday you see year3s. im such a friendly junior :D
yay just recieved two christmas cards. from shiyun and from yuting. a big thank you! :D
anyway, i wanna say thank you to the people who care. at least you all bother to ask about me.
and there is one person whom i can say is my best friend now, thanks for always tolerating me. i shall try to change. you mean a lot to me and yeah sorry for always giving you shit. youre a nice person and a nice friend. thank you. you know who you are.
i hope this post gets onto my blog =/
[edit] it did (:
and that to their eyes you are just being unreasonable?
have you ever wondered how things could hurt so much that it scares you?
and how the people who hurt you so much could go on laughing?
have you ever felt heartache?
**
my comp's still screwed. writing in wordpad now. let's see if internet explorer will be nice to me. if you can see this in my blog, it means internet explorer was nice. lol.
today was a relatively fun day.
sops sounded better today, for some weird reason. we were more blended. yes and i was more on form, not as sucky as ytd. but i feel my voice going =/ probably because of the clam chowder?
yes the first session at ritz was quite soft. the sound was alright, but we were just plain soft. yeah the second session was much better. we sounded much louder and much more energetic :D yeah. except for the screwed up we wish you, i basically enjoyed myself during the second session. yes and a lot of seniors came back today. which was cool. it's been some time since ive seen such a big choir. not that we were very big, but it's just that its much bigger than the usual number. so during the third session, we were all blasting. about 1/4 into the third session, it started raining, and it was really ironic cos when the session started, i was thinking that we were lucky that it wasnt raining-.- yeah so we were moved into this small shelter. and so we werent as impressive. which was quite a sad thing cos we were really quite loud. ): i was hoping we would get more tips. lol. but whatever it is, it was fun :D
yes and i had fun talking to some of the seniors. its great to see some of my crapping partners again (: yes and i talked to some year3s, like just a bit of crap talk. was feeling quite happy about it cos hey its not everyday you see year3s. im such a friendly junior :D
yay just recieved two christmas cards. from shiyun and from yuting. a big thank you! :D
anyway, i wanna say thank you to the people who care. at least you all bother to ask about me.
and there is one person whom i can say is my best friend now, thanks for always tolerating me. i shall try to change. you mean a lot to me and yeah sorry for always giving you shit. youre a nice person and a nice friend. thank you. you know who you are.
i hope this post gets onto my blog =/
[edit] it did (:
Saturday, December 16, 2006
was thinking about quite a few things.
i realised that i go about my day-to-day affairs with a heavy heart.
was talking to jialing a few days back and i commented to her that i feel sad most of the time. in fact, i've kinda forgotten how it feels like to be happy and to have a satisfying day. uh.
and i realised that im not close to many people. im a very biased person, and when i like a person more than another, i start to spend more time with that particular person. and it's bad for my social circle. i feel like ive drifted away from many people. and sometimes i wonder, who are the people who will continue to be my friends still adulthood? how many of these people whom i hang out with everday will i still keep in touch with after they leave? was thinking about the 2b friends. i remember we set a date to meet up when we are 30 years old. how many of us will turn up on that day? i bet no one would. and that's a sad feeling.
went for dhschoir chalet two days ago. i felt so lost. hung out mostly with jerrold, huping, and rayrin, mostly the vj clan. yeah and juntao came along with us too. i was really sad that i hardly talked to the sistas. what happened to our friendship? or maybe it's just me who was drifting away. also, i looked at the people in the chalet and i felt so lost, i didnt know what to say to them. and yet i reme
i realised that i go about my day-to-day affairs with a heavy heart.
was talking to jialing a few days back and i commented to her that i feel sad most of the time. in fact, i've kinda forgotten how it feels like to be happy and to have a satisfying day. uh.
and i realised that im not close to many people. im a very biased person, and when i like a person more than another, i start to spend more time with that particular person. and it's bad for my social circle. i feel like ive drifted away from many people. and sometimes i wonder, who are the people who will continue to be my friends still adulthood? how many of these people whom i hang out with everday will i still keep in touch with after they leave? was thinking about the 2b friends. i remember we set a date to meet up when we are 30 years old. how many of us will turn up on that day? i bet no one would. and that's a sad feeling.
went for dhschoir chalet two days ago. i felt so lost. hung out mostly with jerrold, huping, and rayrin, mostly the vj clan. yeah and juntao came along with us too. i was really sad that i hardly talked to the sistas. what happened to our friendship? or maybe it's just me who was drifting away. also, i looked at the people in the chalet and i felt so lost, i didnt know what to say to them. and yet i reme
was thinking about quite a few things.
i realised that i go about my day-to-day affairs with a heavy heart.
was talking to jialing a few days back and i commented to her that i feel sad most of the time. in fact, i've kinda forgotten how it feels like to be happy and to have a satisfying day. uh.
and i realised that im not close to many people. im a very biased person, and when i like a person more than another, i start to spend more time with that particular person. and it's bad for my social circle. i feel like ive drifted away from many people. and sometimes i wonder, who are the people who will continue to be my friends still adulthood? how many of these people whom i hang out with everday will i still keep in touch with after they leave? was thinking about the 2b friends. i remember we set a date to meet up when we are 30 years old. how many of us will turn up on that day? i bet no one would. and that's a sad feeling.
went for dhschoir chalet two days ago. i felt so lost. hung out mostly with jerrold, huping, and rayrin, mostly the vj clan. yeah and juntao came along with us too. i was really sad that i hardly talked to the sistas. what happened to our friendship? or maybe it's just me who was drifting away. also, i looked at the people in the chalet and i felt so lost, i didnt know what to say to them. and yet i reme
i realised that i go about my day-to-day affairs with a heavy heart.
was talking to jialing a few days back and i commented to her that i feel sad most of the time. in fact, i've kinda forgotten how it feels like to be happy and to have a satisfying day. uh.
and i realised that im not close to many people. im a very biased person, and when i like a person more than another, i start to spend more time with that particular person. and it's bad for my social circle. i feel like ive drifted away from many people. and sometimes i wonder, who are the people who will continue to be my friends still adulthood? how many of these people whom i hang out with everday will i still keep in touch with after they leave? was thinking about the 2b friends. i remember we set a date to meet up when we are 30 years old. how many of us will turn up on that day? i bet no one would. and that's a sad feeling.
went for dhschoir chalet two days ago. i felt so lost. hung out mostly with jerrold, huping, and rayrin, mostly the vj clan. yeah and juntao came along with us too. i was really sad that i hardly talked to the sistas. what happened to our friendship? or maybe it's just me who was drifting away. also, i looked at the people in the chalet and i felt so lost, i didnt know what to say to them. and yet i reme
Thursday, December 14, 2006
i dont like to feel sad.
and unhappy.
but sometimes you just realise you dont really mean much to anyone.
although you've always known that all along, but sometimes you just try not to believe it.
and when you are forced to accept it, it really feels very bad. sigh.
i know i shouldnt be feeling sad, but i cant help it.
sigh.
life is boring.
it's sad to feel unloved and uncared for.
and unhappy.
but sometimes you just realise you dont really mean much to anyone.
although you've always known that all along, but sometimes you just try not to believe it.
and when you are forced to accept it, it really feels very bad. sigh.
i know i shouldnt be feeling sad, but i cant help it.
sigh.
life is boring.
it's sad to feel unloved and uncared for.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
hello people.
my computer is so screwed. it's even dismantled -.- and no one in my family bothers to fix it lol. so dont blame me for not updating my blog :D
hmm. the musical was great. :D fantastic wheehee.
malacca was great too. it was fun for me and i learnt a lot of things, be it for singing or for friendships and such.
im so gonna miss this batch of choir people. i really love them, and it wasnt easy for us to get to know each other this well and for us to get this comfortable with each other. i'm really gonna miss you guy next year when yall leave. please please go to pattaya alright :D
anyway, the choir clique's expanding :D the year zeros are joining us now. and some more people are starting to join us, like fran and heli :D the malacca trip really bonded us together (:
anyway, my homework's rather screwed, taking my time to read all the books. ah they're quite boring, but i'll pull through.
more choir pracs to look forward to (: yay. and i feel im really improving significantly. a great big thanks to the many people who have been encouraging me and teaching me :D
friendships are delicate things, and it takes a lot of time and effort to maintain it. but it really feels great when you reap what you sow :D and something someone told me makes sense, you must feel like you've got to know a person better after a fight, if not it defeats that purpose. im glad that im nearly always able to patch up with my friends after a big fight, and it makes us become better friends. thank goodness for that :D
i miss my class, esp movie marathons! :D meet up soon alright (:
anyway, i think im really gonna see the choir everyday for the rest of this holiday. lol. (:
at danny's house now btw, which explains why i can use the computer. wahahaha.
i shall disappear for another long period of time. ciao :D
my computer is so screwed. it's even dismantled -.- and no one in my family bothers to fix it lol. so dont blame me for not updating my blog :D
hmm. the musical was great. :D fantastic wheehee.
malacca was great too. it was fun for me and i learnt a lot of things, be it for singing or for friendships and such.
im so gonna miss this batch of choir people. i really love them, and it wasnt easy for us to get to know each other this well and for us to get this comfortable with each other. i'm really gonna miss you guy next year when yall leave. please please go to pattaya alright :D
anyway, the choir clique's expanding :D the year zeros are joining us now. and some more people are starting to join us, like fran and heli :D the malacca trip really bonded us together (:
anyway, my homework's rather screwed, taking my time to read all the books. ah they're quite boring, but i'll pull through.
more choir pracs to look forward to (: yay. and i feel im really improving significantly. a great big thanks to the many people who have been encouraging me and teaching me :D
friendships are delicate things, and it takes a lot of time and effort to maintain it. but it really feels great when you reap what you sow :D and something someone told me makes sense, you must feel like you've got to know a person better after a fight, if not it defeats that purpose. im glad that im nearly always able to patch up with my friends after a big fight, and it makes us become better friends. thank goodness for that :D
i miss my class, esp movie marathons! :D meet up soon alright (:
anyway, i think im really gonna see the choir everyday for the rest of this holiday. lol. (:
at danny's house now btw, which explains why i can use the computer. wahahaha.
i shall disappear for another long period of time. ciao :D
Saturday, November 25, 2006
due to popular demand, i shall blog now.
hmm. im at rayrin's house. lol, which explain's why i can blog(my comp's still spoilt).
yep so anyway, i went to try a quiz that shuwei, oliver, wan ting and dawn did. lol. it's really rather accurate.
Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
that's what many people think of me. lol. i think.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
quite true. lol that's provided i fall in love.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
hmm that depends cos i havent met the right person yet.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
VERY VERY VERY true. wahaha. im a mugger what.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
that is true too. lol.
How do you view success:
Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.
hmm, i used to think success was everything. but im starting to doubt that. so maybe it's true to an extent.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
that is quite true. about the showing anger part. lol.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
quite true. lol look ppl, im mature, reasonable and honest. wahaha.
~~
im quite sick of choir pracs recently. quite tiring. everyday 9am. cool ah.
hmm, its interesting that the year zeros are joining us now. lol i really feel like a senior. yay, MAY THE SENIOR :D
uhhuh, im tired. tired. tired. blah.
sian. i really shouldnt have done all the read between the lines. argh! now the whole world knows. and rayrin and xianyong found out today too. SUCKS.
ok i shall go play mahjong now since xianyong wants to surf the net.
dont expect another entry from me anytime soon.
BYE.
i told you. no more read between the lines. shoo!
hmm. im at rayrin's house. lol, which explain's why i can blog(my comp's still spoilt).
yep so anyway, i went to try a quiz that shuwei, oliver, wan ting and dawn did. lol. it's really rather accurate.
Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
that's what many people think of me. lol. i think.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
quite true. lol that's provided i fall in love.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
hmm that depends cos i havent met the right person yet.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
VERY VERY VERY true. wahaha. im a mugger what.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
that is true too. lol.
How do you view success:
Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.
hmm, i used to think success was everything. but im starting to doubt that. so maybe it's true to an extent.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
that is quite true. about the showing anger part. lol.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
quite true. lol look ppl, im mature, reasonable and honest. wahaha.
~~
im quite sick of choir pracs recently. quite tiring. everyday 9am. cool ah.
hmm, its interesting that the year zeros are joining us now. lol i really feel like a senior. yay, MAY THE SENIOR :D
uhhuh, im tired. tired. tired. blah.
sian. i really shouldnt have done all the read between the lines. argh! now the whole world knows. and rayrin and xianyong found out today too. SUCKS.
ok i shall go play mahjong now since xianyong wants to surf the net.
dont expect another entry from me anytime soon.
BYE.
i told you. no more read between the lines. shoo!
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Friday, November 10, 2006
Thursday, November 09, 2006
so. was supposed to go swimming today hahaha. but dint! we went to shixuan's house, and in the end it was so cloudy we decided not to swim. aw sad. so we went to play cards. yeap. haha quite dumb la. and we watched jerrold suan dawn like siao hahahaha. yeah so we decided to go to yuting's house to watch movies since we werent swimming anymore. yeah, so we walked from shixuan's house to parkway. like O.O! lol.
met wan ting and yizha at parkway and proceeded to yuting's house together. lol yeah they were suaning jerrold like mad on the bus la, and being the nice me, i dint really join in hahaha. im so nice right :D
im happy to just be beside you.
yeah after that we walked a LONG way to yuting's house. yeap. watched billy elliot and HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL! hahaha. billy elliot was.. ok la. lol, high school musical was nice :D as always haha. yeap and we played mahjong too. i won two times! haha im on a lucky streak today man. yay. uhhuh so that's basically my day. lol dint do much actually la.
i know you care.
im wondering what we're gonna do tmr. hmm. huping's not going out with us lo. hahaha.
met wan ting and yizha at parkway and proceeded to yuting's house together. lol yeah they were suaning jerrold like mad on the bus la, and being the nice me, i dint really join in hahaha. im so nice right :D
im happy to just be beside you.
yeah after that we walked a LONG way to yuting's house. yeap. watched billy elliot and HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL! hahaha. billy elliot was.. ok la. lol, high school musical was nice :D as always haha. yeap and we played mahjong too. i won two times! haha im on a lucky streak today man. yay. uhhuh so that's basically my day. lol dint do much actually la.
i know you care.
im wondering what we're gonna do tmr. hmm. huping's not going out with us lo. hahaha.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
there was choir today. hah.
you made me sad.
my dearest poh wan ting was freaking late again as usual. well we were supposed to meet at 1130 to go and buy our tops but YET, she woke up at 1130. hahaha. so we met at 1230 instead. i waited for ONE HOUR for poh wan ting ok! LOL. yeah so she owes me a kiss now(:
yeah so we spent some quality time together, talked about a few things hahaha. not like PRIVATELY intimate things la. but it was kinda like a sharing session. hahaha see wan ting loves me. no matter what she says. uh yeah. haha so we bought our tops. wan ting and me are wearing matching tops for the factory worker scene YAY. :D yeah so we ate lunch and then went back to vj. ohh we saw an albino during lunch! freaking cool i tell you, his eyelashes were WHITE! omg right. i think being an albino's cool, but quite poor thing too, there's definitely a lot of staring everywhere you go. which is quite irritating i think.
yeah after that we went for choir. aye they cheated my feelings la! debbie said on mon that we might have carolling prac today, in the end she say dont have! )): damn sad i brought my carolling book somemore, so heavy la! was looking so forward to having carolling prac alright. sighh. ooh yeah so we did musical today. hmm i think its tiring to do the musical. yeah. after that we did il coro for a while. it felt so great to sing il coro after singing all those crappy musical songs alright wahaha :D
why are you being so cold again?
yeap anyway, i finally know my carolling group! wan ting, shuwei, yizha, oliver, martin, wayne, xianyong and possibly yuting will be in my carolling group. YAY (: huping was supposed to be here too, aww he got switched with jeremy gan. sad right! ): nevermind, at least my group's nice, ANNDD, we're going ritz! YAY. double YAY la. hahaha. :D i hope there'll be no more shuffles! LOL. hope everything stays. dont change le lol!
be nice to me please?
uhhuh so after choir i went with yuting wan ting and jerrold to eat bak kut teh. haha they ate other stuff, but it felt so good to eat bak kut teh after so long alright. i love bak kut teh! :D yeah so had quite a lot of fun talking to them. we were talking about babies, and husbands and all those stuff. haha rather interesting yeah, laughed a lot la :D
i wanna go out tmr! feel a bit like mugging hahaha. cos i feel that i really needa revise on my stuff and to catch up with whatever i am lagging behind. yes finish my homework too. i need tuition for maths la. sigh i always wonder why i am so dumb when it comes to maths. zzz. ooh i need to study my sciences too. improve on them lol. yeah. mugger may! :D
you made me sad.
my dearest poh wan ting was freaking late again as usual. well we were supposed to meet at 1130 to go and buy our tops but YET, she woke up at 1130. hahaha. so we met at 1230 instead. i waited for ONE HOUR for poh wan ting ok! LOL. yeah so she owes me a kiss now(:
yeah so we spent some quality time together, talked about a few things hahaha. not like PRIVATELY intimate things la. but it was kinda like a sharing session. hahaha see wan ting loves me. no matter what she says. uh yeah. haha so we bought our tops. wan ting and me are wearing matching tops for the factory worker scene YAY. :D yeah so we ate lunch and then went back to vj. ohh we saw an albino during lunch! freaking cool i tell you, his eyelashes were WHITE! omg right. i think being an albino's cool, but quite poor thing too, there's definitely a lot of staring everywhere you go. which is quite irritating i think.
yeah after that we went for choir. aye they cheated my feelings la! debbie said on mon that we might have carolling prac today, in the end she say dont have! )): damn sad i brought my carolling book somemore, so heavy la! was looking so forward to having carolling prac alright. sighh. ooh yeah so we did musical today. hmm i think its tiring to do the musical. yeah. after that we did il coro for a while. it felt so great to sing il coro after singing all those crappy musical songs alright wahaha :D
why are you being so cold again?
yeap anyway, i finally know my carolling group! wan ting, shuwei, yizha, oliver, martin, wayne, xianyong and possibly yuting will be in my carolling group. YAY (: huping was supposed to be here too, aww he got switched with jeremy gan. sad right! ): nevermind, at least my group's nice, ANNDD, we're going ritz! YAY. double YAY la. hahaha. :D i hope there'll be no more shuffles! LOL. hope everything stays. dont change le lol!
be nice to me please?
uhhuh so after choir i went with yuting wan ting and jerrold to eat bak kut teh. haha they ate other stuff, but it felt so good to eat bak kut teh after so long alright. i love bak kut teh! :D yeah so had quite a lot of fun talking to them. we were talking about babies, and husbands and all those stuff. haha rather interesting yeah, laughed a lot la :D
i wanna go out tmr! feel a bit like mugging hahaha. cos i feel that i really needa revise on my stuff and to catch up with whatever i am lagging behind. yes finish my homework too. i need tuition for maths la. sigh i always wonder why i am so dumb when it comes to maths. zzz. ooh i need to study my sciences too. improve on them lol. yeah. mugger may! :D
gosh. i cant believe i just spent like 3hours ++ playing shopmania. hahaha see this is what you get when you download a game just because you're bored. i played until my wrist is aching and my fingers are numb from clicking. and i should actually be sleeping now. ok i guess im too energetic now cos i slept such a humongous lot today hahaha. i shouldnt keep sleeping uh. cos then i'll be a pig. and im not one. hahaha. this reminds me of the time when the triplets called me 'zhu'. hahaha. they even bought me a pink pig keychain. aww so sweet right. it's still on my handphone :D wahaha. but that's not the point. uhh. so now im blogging about how much my fingers and hands are aching. my lovely nice pretty fingers. hahaha. i should do some exercises for my hands uh. loosen up the muscles yeah baby.
so, i spent all my time at home basically cross stitching and playing the computer. hardly did anything constructive. oh yeah speaking of cross stitching, im so proud of myself! i finally finished the cross stitch from last year! (: waha slow but at least i finished it. my sister's not even 3/4 done with hers hahaha. yeah. and yes i slept. whee. it feels so good to be able to slack huh. finding time for oneself is very important (:
my room is in SUCH a huge mess now i totally dont even want to turn around to look at it. see im such a procrastinator. i know i should clean up my room, and i want to, but im to lazy to do it. blah. i hate dirty and messy places. but i just cant help it. BLAH.
oh yeah im not even sleepy now hahaha basically typing a crap post. hmm, what should i wear for choir tmr? hahaha. what a bimbo question. but that's what i always ask myself. hmm. shall think uhh.
thinking of you :D
ok so can anyone tell im in a good mood today? hahaha. shall keep thinking, and thinking, and thinking. puts me in a good mood lalala. im happy with the situation now. i know it'll change. but just let me be happy with it? wahaha. haha. hahaha. (: cant help being in a good mood sorry. hahaha. let's just hope tmr will be fine yeah. i hope my mood wont go down again. cos i realise that 50% of the time im always in a bad mood during choir =/ i cant help it you know, i want to be in a good mood too. but sometimes, things just happen to put me in a bad mood. blahh.
im not exactly like, darn excited about the musical. im more excited about malacca and carolling hahaha. let's just hope i dont get my period in malacca. cos having your period when youre overseas is one of the worst things that can happen. ): uhhuh. let's just hope and hope hahaha. carolling will be fun. lol. i miss singing competition songs though. lol that's why i like to sing il coro so much, even though its like so freaking high. blah. the jap song sucks, but still, it's a competition song at least haha. i miss the italy songs. ): and i was thinking about sov too. i miss our choreo. it was really darn fun! (: miss dancing with martin too hahaha. he was really a great dance partner :D yay ip power!
uhhuh. there's tons of homework to be completed if im not wrong. what chinese project etc etc. crap la. one more year and chinese will be OVER for me! yay. but im fine with chinese anyway, i dont exactly do VERY badly for it yepyep. im still worried about maths. ): ive been worried about maths since sec2 luh! how sad. i wonder why my maths is so lousy when my sciences are so good. that's weird man. i shall TRY HARDER for maths. yes yes listen in class more attentively and all that.
i love my ring tone, zha zha zha zha chu zhou lub chou la ja ja ja zhao zha zha zha zhao.
oh anyway, i need props for the musical. so far, i havent managed to get a prostitute accessory (furry fan/mary poppins umbrella/lacey hanky). anyone has? please lend me! (: yeap and i still need to buy a top to complete my outfits lol. i dont really like all my outfits for les mis. abit the revealing uh. sigh. dont like dont like. ):
i shall think positive. hughughug.
ok this is enough crap for you people to put up with lol. tmr going with wanting to buy my lacey top. yeap so i shall catch up on MORE beauty sleep wahaha. (: cya people!
so, i spent all my time at home basically cross stitching and playing the computer. hardly did anything constructive. oh yeah speaking of cross stitching, im so proud of myself! i finally finished the cross stitch from last year! (: waha slow but at least i finished it. my sister's not even 3/4 done with hers hahaha. yeah. and yes i slept. whee. it feels so good to be able to slack huh. finding time for oneself is very important (:
my room is in SUCH a huge mess now i totally dont even want to turn around to look at it. see im such a procrastinator. i know i should clean up my room, and i want to, but im to lazy to do it. blah. i hate dirty and messy places. but i just cant help it. BLAH.
oh yeah im not even sleepy now hahaha basically typing a crap post. hmm, what should i wear for choir tmr? hahaha. what a bimbo question. but that's what i always ask myself. hmm. shall think uhh.
thinking of you :D
ok so can anyone tell im in a good mood today? hahaha. shall keep thinking, and thinking, and thinking. puts me in a good mood lalala. im happy with the situation now. i know it'll change. but just let me be happy with it? wahaha. haha. hahaha. (: cant help being in a good mood sorry. hahaha. let's just hope tmr will be fine yeah. i hope my mood wont go down again. cos i realise that 50% of the time im always in a bad mood during choir =/ i cant help it you know, i want to be in a good mood too. but sometimes, things just happen to put me in a bad mood. blahh.
im not exactly like, darn excited about the musical. im more excited about malacca and carolling hahaha. let's just hope i dont get my period in malacca. cos having your period when youre overseas is one of the worst things that can happen. ): uhhuh. let's just hope and hope hahaha. carolling will be fun. lol. i miss singing competition songs though. lol that's why i like to sing il coro so much, even though its like so freaking high. blah. the jap song sucks, but still, it's a competition song at least haha. i miss the italy songs. ): and i was thinking about sov too. i miss our choreo. it was really darn fun! (: miss dancing with martin too hahaha. he was really a great dance partner :D yay ip power!
uhhuh. there's tons of homework to be completed if im not wrong. what chinese project etc etc. crap la. one more year and chinese will be OVER for me! yay. but im fine with chinese anyway, i dont exactly do VERY badly for it yepyep. im still worried about maths. ): ive been worried about maths since sec2 luh! how sad. i wonder why my maths is so lousy when my sciences are so good. that's weird man. i shall TRY HARDER for maths. yes yes listen in class more attentively and all that.
i love my ring tone, zha zha zha zha chu zhou lub chou la ja ja ja zhao zha zha zha zhao.
oh anyway, i need props for the musical. so far, i havent managed to get a prostitute accessory (furry fan/mary poppins umbrella/lacey hanky). anyone has? please lend me! (: yeap and i still need to buy a top to complete my outfits lol. i dont really like all my outfits for les mis. abit the revealing uh. sigh. dont like dont like. ):
i shall think positive. hughughug.
ok this is enough crap for you people to put up with lol. tmr going with wanting to buy my lacey top. yeap so i shall catch up on MORE beauty sleep wahaha. (: cya people!
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
its been a few days since i last blogged. lol, miss me? xD
anyway, life's been fine nowadays. ive decided to drop RM. hope im not making the wrong decisions. hmm.
yeah, i shall forgive and forget. what for keep holding a grudge just for my face? saving a friendship is more important i guess. anyway, you're dumb cos you dont even know im talking about you ><
anyway, its been getting better. hahaha. somehow its not so distant now. the 'it' is another totally different matter btw hahaha. i hope this lasts. although i know it wont, but ah i shall just treasure it for now. maybe those days will come back. hahaha, april :D
i wonder if anyone knows what im talking about. so vague ><
yeahh i know my carolling group already. basses not comfirmed yet, but i really really hope that my group will be the bitchy group (i.e. have hp and yizha and oliver hahaha), sigh no jerr. that's sad. and no yuting, that's sad too. ): NO RAYRIN. even sadder. ahhh.
nevermind carolling will be fun anyway, martin's conducting! YAY :D ohh there's carolling prac tmr anyway hahaha. its been a long time. anyway, people, buy tickets from me leh!
anyway, life's been fine nowadays. ive decided to drop RM. hope im not making the wrong decisions. hmm.
yeah, i shall forgive and forget. what for keep holding a grudge just for my face? saving a friendship is more important i guess. anyway, you're dumb cos you dont even know im talking about you ><
anyway, its been getting better. hahaha. somehow its not so distant now. the 'it' is another totally different matter btw hahaha. i hope this lasts. although i know it wont, but ah i shall just treasure it for now. maybe those days will come back. hahaha, april :D
i wonder if anyone knows what im talking about. so vague ><
yeahh i know my carolling group already. basses not comfirmed yet, but i really really hope that my group will be the bitchy group (i.e. have hp and yizha and oliver hahaha), sigh no jerr. that's sad. and no yuting, that's sad too. ): NO RAYRIN. even sadder. ahhh.
nevermind carolling will be fun anyway, martin's conducting! YAY :D ohh there's carolling prac tmr anyway hahaha. its been a long time. anyway, people, buy tickets from me leh!
Friday, November 03, 2006
i just got that RM email from mr teo, said i got into the second round, and now its up to the SMP to approve. hmm i should be feeling happy now? but im not exactly.. urgh. was starting to think whether it would be a bad choice to apply for SMP, cos i seriously dunno if i can commit. i hope it doesnt clash with choir =/ see i dont like troublesome things and the SMP is really troublesome. and youknow what, i really hate doing projects. and SMP will just be ANOTHER imagineering, although of course SMP will be more interesting and more useful. eurgh. shant think about it. i just hope i dont give up on SMP.
**
i just spent an hour and a half reading through our past msn convos, and memories came flooding back. i kinda forgotten all about you this past week or so, and i was just seriously SO dumb to go and read the saved msg convos.
'anyway, i wont hate you la!
haha
why you think that way'
'lol just think that way la'
'must have faith in me
im your good friend'
'i still remember what you said the other day
wad wo xuan ze le ni
LOL that was hilarious la'
'oh lol
trying to make some link ma
also to cheer you up'
'im really glad to have you as a friend
hope nothing changes'
'yay i managed to get you to say it a 2nd time'
'eh arent you thankful you have me as a friend too'
'yeah im doubly thankful'
'i dun take it to heart cos i know you like me alot'
'HUMPH
i like you alot
but you dont like me alot
SEEE'
'i like you alot la'
'u gotta trust me can'
'i dont
so how?'
'gotta learn how to'
'because i expect you to go ma
and look forward to seeing you'
'i also look forward to seeing u what. im sad too'
'do you like me alot?'
'yes if not i wouldnt regard you as my close fren'
'i can uds why i like you alot
but i dont uds why you like me alot'
'then why you like me alot'
'because youre very nice?'
'i like u alot cuz u can cheer me up and make life happier for me
and oso i find it very easy and comfortable to talk to you'
'will you ever dislike me?
i scared
i dont want our friendship to change
i like it the way it is now'
'thr's only one ans to it as for now
i cant say i will dislike you'
'i dont uds'
'lol
im your close fren
just bear in mind that'
'i treasure my frens
unless they dont treasure me'
'i treasure you leh
you should be honoured'
'i'll learn to cherish you as a friend (:'
'dont worry la we'll learn to cherish'
'haha did you have fun today?'
'i really had fun la'
'ok that's good :D'
'then did u have fun?'
'haha
was very fun'
that's just some exerpts of what we said to each other last time. HA. how ironic to look back and to compare it with the situation now. where did all the 'treasuring', 'cherishing', 'i wont dislike you la' go to? its really sad you know. when i read through our past convos, i realised that you did care for me. but i guess it doesnt apply anymore. sigh. its rather sad to lose something that i really wanted to keep. i guess my worst fears came true. sigh. im really miss our friendship back then, i wonder who had changed. is it me or is it you? or maybe it was just the both of us, or maybe we both just got sick of each other.
but then, i realise that what you SAY doenst tally with what you do. i bet you dont miss our friendship at all. and i was thinking, maybe you SAID you cared, but you didnt in actual fact. sigh. i dont like guessing games. and i guess i was quite stupid to have read the convo, cos it just made me miss our friendship. sigh.
i know it'll be a long time before you read this thing. and im wondering if you would even feel anything upon reading this post. i bet you will just think im being emo again. sigh.
this is an emo post. blah.
'but hey i dont mind being best friends'. ):
**
i just spent an hour and a half reading through our past msn convos, and memories came flooding back. i kinda forgotten all about you this past week or so, and i was just seriously SO dumb to go and read the saved msg convos.
'anyway, i wont hate you la!
haha
why you think that way'
'lol just think that way la'
'must have faith in me
im your good friend'
'i still remember what you said the other day
wad wo xuan ze le ni
LOL that was hilarious la'
'oh lol
trying to make some link ma
also to cheer you up'
'im really glad to have you as a friend
hope nothing changes'
'yay i managed to get you to say it a 2nd time'
'eh arent you thankful you have me as a friend too'
'yeah im doubly thankful'
'i dun take it to heart cos i know you like me alot'
'HUMPH
i like you alot
but you dont like me alot
SEEE'
'i like you alot la'
'u gotta trust me can'
'i dont
so how?'
'gotta learn how to'
'because i expect you to go ma
and look forward to seeing you'
'i also look forward to seeing u what. im sad too'
'do you like me alot?'
'yes if not i wouldnt regard you as my close fren'
'i can uds why i like you alot
but i dont uds why you like me alot'
'then why you like me alot'
'because youre very nice?'
'i like u alot cuz u can cheer me up and make life happier for me
and oso i find it very easy and comfortable to talk to you'
'will you ever dislike me?
i scared
i dont want our friendship to change
i like it the way it is now'
'thr's only one ans to it as for now
i cant say i will dislike you'
'i dont uds'
'lol
im your close fren
just bear in mind that'
'i treasure my frens
unless they dont treasure me'
'i treasure you leh
you should be honoured'
'i'll learn to cherish you as a friend (:'
'dont worry la we'll learn to cherish'
'haha did you have fun today?'
'i really had fun la'
'ok that's good :D'
'then did u have fun?'
'haha
was very fun'
that's just some exerpts of what we said to each other last time. HA. how ironic to look back and to compare it with the situation now. where did all the 'treasuring', 'cherishing', 'i wont dislike you la' go to? its really sad you know. when i read through our past convos, i realised that you did care for me. but i guess it doesnt apply anymore. sigh. its rather sad to lose something that i really wanted to keep. i guess my worst fears came true. sigh. im really miss our friendship back then, i wonder who had changed. is it me or is it you? or maybe it was just the both of us, or maybe we both just got sick of each other.
but then, i realise that what you SAY doenst tally with what you do. i bet you dont miss our friendship at all. and i was thinking, maybe you SAID you cared, but you didnt in actual fact. sigh. i dont like guessing games. and i guess i was quite stupid to have read the convo, cos it just made me miss our friendship. sigh.
i know it'll be a long time before you read this thing. and im wondering if you would even feel anything upon reading this post. i bet you will just think im being emo again. sigh.
this is an emo post. blah.
'but hey i dont mind being best friends'. ):
Thursday, November 02, 2006
sometimes i get so weird,
i even freak myself out.
**
uh. boring boring boring.
i am SUCH a procrastinator.
ive been telling myself that i needa mug, but im in a slacker mood now. and what's worse, after the o levels are over, i'll be even more slack, cos it'll be carolling time, and teaparty time, and malacca time, and concert time.
bleah. i should make full use of this week to mug a little, tidy up my room etc.
but im just simply too lazy.
i meant to do it today, but yet i came online, and there's absolutely nothing to do online, so guess what? i went to download a game. x.x im being so retarded seriously.
BLAH.
ive decided that i cant click with cat high guys.
**
im not missing you.
goodbye to you. these songs are playing in my zen,
guess im trying to psycho myself.
i even freak myself out.
**
uh. boring boring boring.
i am SUCH a procrastinator.
ive been telling myself that i needa mug, but im in a slacker mood now. and what's worse, after the o levels are over, i'll be even more slack, cos it'll be carolling time, and teaparty time, and malacca time, and concert time.
bleah. i should make full use of this week to mug a little, tidy up my room etc.
but im just simply too lazy.
i meant to do it today, but yet i came online, and there's absolutely nothing to do online, so guess what? i went to download a game. x.x im being so retarded seriously.
BLAH.
ive decided that i cant click with cat high guys.
**
im not missing you.
goodbye to you.
guess im trying to psycho myself.
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Ripped from huping's blog.
One. Think of 15 short bits of interesting stuff about yourself. And they've gotta be true.
Two. Come up with 5 false statements regarding yourself, but for fun's sake keep them in the threshold of believability.
Three. Jumble them all up together and list them in any order.
Four. Post them on your blog and let people guess which the five false ones are!
Five. Get 5 others to do the same.
1. i like to pluck guys' leg hair.
2. i like skinny guys.
3. i dont like anyone now.
4. i dont believe in love.
5. i think that kids are horrible things.
6. ive never dated before.
7. i love hugs.
8. ive never had a single nosebleed.
9. my psl aggregate was 261, with 2As and 2A*s
10. ill only marry a guy who can sing.
11. i love sports.
12. i think wearing contacts are uncomfortable.
13. ive been singing for six years already.
14. i hated choir when i was in primary school.
15. i hate chocolate.
16. my favourite colour is purple.
17. my favourite disney princess is sleeping beauty.
18. i think that arts enslaves and science liberates.
19. i just want to be happy.
20. i think yul is super cute.
im not tagging anyone haha. but people, do try to guess which are the false ones. tag on my tagboard! (:
One. Think of 15 short bits of interesting stuff about yourself. And they've gotta be true.
Two. Come up with 5 false statements regarding yourself, but for fun's sake keep them in the threshold of believability.
Three. Jumble them all up together and list them in any order.
Four. Post them on your blog and let people guess which the five false ones are!
Five. Get 5 others to do the same.
1. i like to pluck guys' leg hair.
2. i like skinny guys.
3. i dont like anyone now.
4. i dont believe in love.
5. i think that kids are horrible things.
6. ive never dated before.
7. i love hugs.
8. ive never had a single nosebleed.
9. my psl aggregate was 261, with 2As and 2A*s
10. ill only marry a guy who can sing.
11. i love sports.
12. i think wearing contacts are uncomfortable.
13. ive been singing for six years already.
14. i hated choir when i was in primary school.
15. i hate chocolate.
16. my favourite colour is purple.
17. my favourite disney princess is sleeping beauty.
18. i think that arts enslaves and science liberates.
19. i just want to be happy.
20. i think yul is super cute.
im not tagging anyone haha. but people, do try to guess which are the false ones. tag on my tagboard! (:
ok, so indieventure's over. finally.
yeah i really wanna thank ian and yiling for the hard work they put in last night to complete our slide presentations and the ads. yes, they hardly slept at all if im not wrong. thanks so much yeah (:
anyway, we presented today, and it was alright. i mean, seeing as it being something that was done in one night. i really think we did fine. we dint get into the finals, and i guess ian was a bit upset cos he thought that his effort was kinda wasted. hmm, ian dont be sad already right! we appreciate all your hard work (:
yes today, i realised that im not very involved in ip. im not even helping out for the symposium. i dunno if its a good or bad thing to not be involved, i kinda feel left out of everything. sometimes i think i shouldnt be so 'unenthu' about ip. afterall, im gonna be here for only a year more, and i should really appreciate the times spent in the ip. maybe i should have a more 'go for it' attitude, instead of saying, 'aiya heck la' all the time. hmm, i guess one of my new year resolutions will be to improve my attitude. yes, i shall TRY to be more enthu. but i know myself, i'll give up trying soon after that. haii. see that's the problem with me. im lazy, lazy to change the parts of myself that i know are imperfect. nevermind, i'll see what happens. i'll still try..
anyway, was reading the choir people's blogs. haha most of them blogged about the trip to dawn's house. hahaha. it was really fun, thanks dawn! (: anyway i think vjchoir's full of himbos and bimbos, except me of course (: im too intellectual to be a bimbo please. hahaha. yeah i really have fun with these people sometimes, love you guys :D
anyway, i know i get moody very easily sometimes, and that's very bad, for i'll just give everybody the black face. i know i shouldn't show my feelings so outright.. but yeah most of the time when i get moody, i dont even care about what others feel. sigh. i really should try to hide my emotions more.
i think i have a lot of flaws in my character, but i cant seem to change them. sigh, maybe i'm too used to behaving this way because i grew up like this. i think i've really matured a lot this year. on the same day last year, i wouldnt think that i had so many flaws and imperfections, and i wouldnt be able to see my weaknesses so clearly. sigh.
haizy.
i hope next year will be a better year, for this year has really been a year with a lot of troubling times for me, especially at the beginning of the year. yes. hope people (:
yeah i really wanna thank ian and yiling for the hard work they put in last night to complete our slide presentations and the ads. yes, they hardly slept at all if im not wrong. thanks so much yeah (:
anyway, we presented today, and it was alright. i mean, seeing as it being something that was done in one night. i really think we did fine. we dint get into the finals, and i guess ian was a bit upset cos he thought that his effort was kinda wasted. hmm, ian dont be sad already right! we appreciate all your hard work (:
yes today, i realised that im not very involved in ip. im not even helping out for the symposium. i dunno if its a good or bad thing to not be involved, i kinda feel left out of everything. sometimes i think i shouldnt be so 'unenthu' about ip. afterall, im gonna be here for only a year more, and i should really appreciate the times spent in the ip. maybe i should have a more 'go for it' attitude, instead of saying, 'aiya heck la' all the time. hmm, i guess one of my new year resolutions will be to improve my attitude. yes, i shall TRY to be more enthu. but i know myself, i'll give up trying soon after that. haii. see that's the problem with me. im lazy, lazy to change the parts of myself that i know are imperfect. nevermind, i'll see what happens. i'll still try..
anyway, was reading the choir people's blogs. haha most of them blogged about the trip to dawn's house. hahaha. it was really fun, thanks dawn! (: anyway i think vjchoir's full of himbos and bimbos, except me of course (: im too intellectual to be a bimbo please. hahaha. yeah i really have fun with these people sometimes, love you guys :D
anyway, i know i get moody very easily sometimes, and that's very bad, for i'll just give everybody the black face. i know i shouldn't show my feelings so outright.. but yeah most of the time when i get moody, i dont even care about what others feel. sigh. i really should try to hide my emotions more.
i think i have a lot of flaws in my character, but i cant seem to change them. sigh, maybe i'm too used to behaving this way because i grew up like this. i think i've really matured a lot this year. on the same day last year, i wouldnt think that i had so many flaws and imperfections, and i wouldnt be able to see my weaknesses so clearly. sigh.
haizy.
i hope next year will be a better year, for this year has really been a year with a lot of troubling times for me, especially at the beginning of the year. yes. hope people (:
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Thursday, October 26, 2006
hello people.
indieventure's started.
my project's quite fun actually, but then. its rather tedious. i kinda hate doing projects. uh. hate it hate it. and i hate presenting. =/
oh well today was alright la. rather irritating at some points, but it was bearable. uhhuh.
was thinking a lot today. hmm.
thinking of you mainly.
oh and anyway, im really tired. tired of everything. bleah.
im craving for your hug, can you hug me again?
anyway ive realised that ive been through a lot this year. nevermind let's hope next year will be a better year. (:
here's an advert,
LE MISERABLES
VJ PT
1st DEC 2006
7.30pm
tickets priced at 12bucks.
free seating.
please do try to come! (:
indieventure's started.
my project's quite fun actually, but then. its rather tedious. i kinda hate doing projects. uh. hate it hate it. and i hate presenting. =/
oh well today was alright la. rather irritating at some points, but it was bearable. uhhuh.
was thinking a lot today. hmm.
thinking of you mainly.
oh and anyway, im really tired. tired of everything. bleah.
im craving for your hug, can you hug me again?
anyway ive realised that ive been through a lot this year. nevermind let's hope next year will be a better year. (:
here's an advert,
LE MISERABLES
VJ PT
1st DEC 2006
7.30pm
tickets priced at 12bucks.
free seating.
please do try to come! (:
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
ok so let me continue from my previous post.
yeap so after that guowei came, and we decided to watch.. THE OTHERS! it's this supposedly horror movie. but it wasnt very horrorful, and it wasnt very scary. the story line is cool though, and the twist at the end is so unexpected! (: its quite a good movie la. i love nicole kidman! yeap.
after that elroy came! yippee yay. yep so we watched charlie and the chocolate factory. i never watched it before anyway hahaha. its not too bad la. oh and we were folding cranes out of the gold foil from ferrero rocher. haha. quite cool, wonder if althea took a picture.
yep after that we had our dinner. (: althea's house the meals all quite nice haha. we had fried rice just now, yep with a few vegetables. uhhuh. talked quite a big during the meal. it was nice (: haha, before i left we took a few group shots too. not bad la! haha. hope althea posts it up soon :D
yeap, im quite thankful for having 06v11 as a class, we're really a nice class! the people are nice and we're quite bonded haha. im happy. (: lucky we bonded early, and now we still have one more year to enjoy the bondedness. yay. hope nothing else happens.
i realised ive learnt a lot this year. valuable lessons that cannot be learned elsewhere. and yes i've learnt how to appreciate. maybe i havent learnt how to cherish, but at the very least, i know how to appreciate. and i know how to look at the bright side of life, even though i've learnt not to be naive. sounds complicated yeah. haha. (:
oh i really gotta thank althea! thanks so much for opening up your house these two days, its been really fun! (: we did simple things but it had been fun all the same. wahaha. yes and thanks for all the food. i think we ate quite a lot of stuff at your house hahaha. hope we have more such sessions next time (x
i know you,
i know you from once upon a dream.
yeap so after that guowei came, and we decided to watch.. THE OTHERS! it's this supposedly horror movie. but it wasnt very horrorful, and it wasnt very scary. the story line is cool though, and the twist at the end is so unexpected! (: its quite a good movie la. i love nicole kidman! yeap.
after that elroy came! yippee yay. yep so we watched charlie and the chocolate factory. i never watched it before anyway hahaha. its not too bad la. oh and we were folding cranes out of the gold foil from ferrero rocher. haha. quite cool, wonder if althea took a picture.
yep after that we had our dinner. (: althea's house the meals all quite nice haha. we had fried rice just now, yep with a few vegetables. uhhuh. talked quite a big during the meal. it was nice (: haha, before i left we took a few group shots too. not bad la! haha. hope althea posts it up soon :D
yeap, im quite thankful for having 06v11 as a class, we're really a nice class! the people are nice and we're quite bonded haha. im happy. (: lucky we bonded early, and now we still have one more year to enjoy the bondedness. yay. hope nothing else happens.
i realised ive learnt a lot this year. valuable lessons that cannot be learned elsewhere. and yes i've learnt how to appreciate. maybe i havent learnt how to cherish, but at the very least, i know how to appreciate. and i know how to look at the bright side of life, even though i've learnt not to be naive. sounds complicated yeah. haha. (:
oh i really gotta thank althea! thanks so much for opening up your house these two days, its been really fun! (: we did simple things but it had been fun all the same. wahaha. yes and thanks for all the food. i think we ate quite a lot of stuff at your house hahaha. hope we have more such sessions next time (x
i know you,
i know you from once upon a dream.
hello people.
im at althea's house now. wahaha. disney princesses woots! (: super nice. we've watched sleeping beauty, little mermaid and cinderella so far. no idea what we're gonna watch later.. perhaps aladdin (: waha.
the music is so nice. ok so anyway i had a great lunch, super nice and filling wahaha. let's see, we ordered hawaiian pizza, and althea's NICE mum cooked sphaghetti for us (: its really nice yay. later we're gonna have fried rice. hahaha.
i sat on the massage chair for like one hour. think im suffering from side effects now. =/ my muscles are aching more than before i sat on the chair hahaha. yep anyway i love the disney princess music! (: so dreamy and lovely. whee.
oh we played mahjong too. wahaha. i dint win ): but nevermind it was fun!
althea's going down to fetch guowei now, elroy just left. lol. hope there'll be more people next time. yep.
yay i think althea's coming up now. off to more movies!
im dreaming of our own fairytale (:
im at althea's house now. wahaha. disney princesses woots! (: super nice. we've watched sleeping beauty, little mermaid and cinderella so far. no idea what we're gonna watch later.. perhaps aladdin (: waha.
the music is so nice. ok so anyway i had a great lunch, super nice and filling wahaha. let's see, we ordered hawaiian pizza, and althea's NICE mum cooked sphaghetti for us (: its really nice yay. later we're gonna have fried rice. hahaha.
i sat on the massage chair for like one hour. think im suffering from side effects now. =/ my muscles are aching more than before i sat on the chair hahaha. yep anyway i love the disney princess music! (: so dreamy and lovely. whee.
oh we played mahjong too. wahaha. i dint win ): but nevermind it was fun!
althea's going down to fetch guowei now, elroy just left. lol. hope there'll be more people next time. yep.
yay i think althea's coming up now. off to more movies!
im dreaming of our own fairytale (:
Monday, October 23, 2006
you know what?
youre such a sucker. ive had enough of you. ive tried my best to the best and most supportive friend you can ever have. perhaps ive tried too hard, and you're just taking me for granted.
if you dont care about whatever that's happening to me, fine. 'whatever im not interested'. have you any idea how much it hurt me? i care so much for you, but to you, im just a nobody whom you dont care two hoots about.
ive always thought you were a nice and thoughtful guy. well you've proved me wrong. this is not the first time you've hurt me. it sucks to know that ive judged a person wrongly, but at least, i can comfort myself by knowing that im not continuing this one-sided friendship anymore. i've told you so many times about how i feel. i bet you've never cared. and i was stupid to think that i could change you.
youre such a self-centred person. your world is just filled with her. your friends dont matter to you at all. so much for trying to change you, so much for trying to be a good friend, so much for the whole cfs thing. i tried to make you care for your friends, i've realised that it will never work. you dont care about others, you only care about yourself. you only care about your own feelings. 'its not that i dont care, its just that ive got other priorities'. that's bullshit i tell you, B U L L S H I T.
thanks, for making me realise that ive wasted my time and effort.
thanks, for letting me save myself from wasting my time next year.
thanks, for letting me realise what a lousy friend is.
thanks, for letting me see what you're really like.
thanks ah.
i know that when you read this, you'll probably roll your eyes and think that im over-reacting.
and you know what? this time round, im not caring. im not even expecting an apology from you. im not expecting anything from you anymore. thanks for relieving me of this burden, of being obliged to care for you. of course, i dont deny that i will still care for you, i cant help it. but i'll get used to knowing that i dont and never had your friendship. and maybe i'll stop caring for you soon.
maybe we'll be superficial friends, ive gotta see you for two more years anyway. who knows.
btw, forget the whole cfs thing, we were never good friends anyway.
youre such a sucker. ive had enough of you. ive tried my best to the best and most supportive friend you can ever have. perhaps ive tried too hard, and you're just taking me for granted.
if you dont care about whatever that's happening to me, fine. 'whatever im not interested'. have you any idea how much it hurt me? i care so much for you, but to you, im just a nobody whom you dont care two hoots about.
ive always thought you were a nice and thoughtful guy. well you've proved me wrong. this is not the first time you've hurt me. it sucks to know that ive judged a person wrongly, but at least, i can comfort myself by knowing that im not continuing this one-sided friendship anymore. i've told you so many times about how i feel. i bet you've never cared. and i was stupid to think that i could change you.
youre such a self-centred person. your world is just filled with her. your friends dont matter to you at all. so much for trying to change you, so much for trying to be a good friend, so much for the whole cfs thing. i tried to make you care for your friends, i've realised that it will never work. you dont care about others, you only care about yourself. you only care about your own feelings. 'its not that i dont care, its just that ive got other priorities'. that's bullshit i tell you, B U L L S H I T.
thanks, for making me realise that ive wasted my time and effort.
thanks, for letting me save myself from wasting my time next year.
thanks, for letting me realise what a lousy friend is.
thanks, for letting me see what you're really like.
thanks ah.
i know that when you read this, you'll probably roll your eyes and think that im over-reacting.
and you know what? this time round, im not caring. im not even expecting an apology from you. im not expecting anything from you anymore. thanks for relieving me of this burden, of being obliged to care for you. of course, i dont deny that i will still care for you, i cant help it. but i'll get used to knowing that i dont and never had your friendship. and maybe i'll stop caring for you soon.
maybe we'll be superficial friends, ive gotta see you for two more years anyway. who knows.
btw, forget the whole cfs thing, we were never good friends anyway.
HELLO PEOPLE.
went swimming today. wahaha. and i watched princess hours! hahaha. so we watched the sweet parts only (: we skipped all the boring parts, where the old tarts talked. hahaha. I LOVE SHIN. shin is absolutely cool. OMG. (:
so, alicea arrived VERY late. and then we went to swim (: yep swam a few laps, den we played some games, like finding the goggles, crocodile, mr wolf etc. hahaha. in the end we just sat down and gossiped and talked hahaha. it was rather fun. yes and i got a NICE DEEP tan. wheehee! i kinda look like an indian, but the tan is really not bad (: YAY.
this brings back memories of us. :D
after that we played a bit of mahjong. but i can feel like im falling sick. aww sad ): i feel hot all over my body. and there's a bit of a headache. blah i dont wanna fall sick! i still needa sing, and play, and do work. -.- which reminds me, there's still chinese and maths homework to do. im feeling so cold now, and so tired. hahaha swimming tires you out.
uhh after playing mahjong we went to do a makeover for alicea! super cool alright. haha we ended up drawing make up on each other. and we then styled annette's (althea's youngest sister) hair. haha. after that we watched the final episode of goong! whoots. it was super cool yeah. SHIN and the caijing, they're like omg so sweet and cute together! ((: gives you that warm fuzzy feeling when you watch them together haha.
yep after that ate dinner and went home (:
there's disney princess movie marathon tmr! it'll sorta be like a party. haha. we're ordering pizza, and reliving our childhood. elroy and guowei are coming tmr too, hope they dont pangseh! haha. ok im tired. >< shall go and read the MANYMANY books i borrowed from althea (x
oh, and im too lazy to reply my tags alr. haha. people when yall tag dont expect a reply alright (: i still like to see people tag anyway (x oh and grace, my blog very emo meh? :P
went swimming today. wahaha. and i watched princess hours! hahaha. so we watched the sweet parts only (: we skipped all the boring parts, where the old tarts talked. hahaha. I LOVE SHIN. shin is absolutely cool. OMG. (:
so, alicea arrived VERY late. and then we went to swim (: yep swam a few laps, den we played some games, like finding the goggles, crocodile, mr wolf etc. hahaha. in the end we just sat down and gossiped and talked hahaha. it was rather fun. yes and i got a NICE DEEP tan. wheehee! i kinda look like an indian, but the tan is really not bad (: YAY.
this brings back memories of us. :D
after that we played a bit of mahjong. but i can feel like im falling sick. aww sad ): i feel hot all over my body. and there's a bit of a headache. blah i dont wanna fall sick! i still needa sing, and play, and do work. -.- which reminds me, there's still chinese and maths homework to do. im feeling so cold now, and so tired. hahaha swimming tires you out.
uhh after playing mahjong we went to do a makeover for alicea! super cool alright. haha we ended up drawing make up on each other. and we then styled annette's (althea's youngest sister) hair. haha. after that we watched the final episode of goong! whoots. it was super cool yeah. SHIN and the caijing, they're like omg so sweet and cute together! ((: gives you that warm fuzzy feeling when you watch them together haha.
yep after that ate dinner and went home (:
there's disney princess movie marathon tmr! it'll sorta be like a party. haha. we're ordering pizza, and reliving our childhood. elroy and guowei are coming tmr too, hope they dont pangseh! haha. ok im tired. >< shall go and read the MANYMANY books i borrowed from althea (x
oh, and im too lazy to reply my tags alr. haha. people when yall tag dont expect a reply alright (: i still like to see people tag anyway (x oh and grace, my blog very emo meh? :P
Sunday, October 22, 2006
hello people!
so, i slacked for the first part of today.
thought about you.
and i did a few things.
half-memorised my scores,
almost completed my cross-stitch,
ironed most of my clothes,
read a bit of narnia.
was hoping to be able to see you too.
uhhuh, went out to meet huping, wan ting and yu ting after that. it was fun. hahaha, walked around, laughed alot and talked. (: yep it was funnnn!
tmr im going to althea's house to watch GOONG. whoots! think we're gonna swim before that, hope the haze's not too bad. ooh and i dint tell my dad that i'm gonna swim, feel so uneasy about that. =/ if he finds out im dead shit. i hate this type of sneaky sneaky feeling. uhh i'd rather tell him and get everything over and done with. den can do everything openly. but still, i dont dare to say =/ bloops.
nevermind, still. GOONG tmr! so exciting (:
and there's disney princess movie marathon on tues. wahaha. the next two days will be spent at althea's hse, then on wed, THERE'LL BE CHOIR! (:
shant keep thinking of you. its bittersweet.
wahaha i love vjchoir! love all the people, although of course i get irritated by some people sometimes, but most of the time, i like them la. (:
so, i slacked for the first part of today.
thought about you.
and i did a few things.
half-memorised my scores,
almost completed my cross-stitch,
ironed most of my clothes,
read a bit of narnia.
was hoping to be able to see you too.
uhhuh, went out to meet huping, wan ting and yu ting after that. it was fun. hahaha, walked around, laughed alot and talked. (: yep it was funnnn!
tmr im going to althea's house to watch GOONG. whoots! think we're gonna swim before that, hope the haze's not too bad. ooh and i dint tell my dad that i'm gonna swim, feel so uneasy about that. =/ if he finds out im dead shit. i hate this type of sneaky sneaky feeling. uhh i'd rather tell him and get everything over and done with. den can do everything openly. but still, i dont dare to say =/ bloops.
nevermind, still. GOONG tmr! so exciting (:
and there's disney princess movie marathon on tues. wahaha. the next two days will be spent at althea's hse, then on wed, THERE'LL BE CHOIR! (:
shant keep thinking of you. its bittersweet.
wahaha i love vjchoir! love all the people, although of course i get irritated by some people sometimes, but most of the time, i like them la. (:
Saturday, October 21, 2006
im thinking a lot nowadays.
life is so wonderful, sometimes.
but sometimes, it just downright sucks.
but its really an amazing thing, that we all gotta admit.
life in itself is a miracle. have you every wondered how some simple elements can combine together to form life? have you wondered how we can think, and feel and analyse? have you every wondered why some things are not alive? have you ever wondered why you are you, a human, and not an animal? have you ever wondered why you look the way you do, be it pretty or ugly?
there are just so many unanswerable questions in life. the answer is just fate. and its really a miraculous thing. fate is what brings us to meet who we meet in life, and it decides our family, and our friends, and our environment.
its just so fascinating isnt it? ok i know im talking nonsense, but sometimes i just think about this and feel so amazed by how everything works.
nevermind let me talk about something comprehensive hahaha. there was choir today. it was sort of disappointing for me, because i wanted to sing il coro. not everybody was here, so the musical was kinda fei too. ohwell at least we know how to sing all the songs already. the musical will be interesting, what with the many different types of scenes. hahaha. lovely ladies is FUNNEH. i think choir has many talents, and the singers are mostly good. haha. yay love vj choir.
hmm, sometimes im just so fed up with hormones. it makes me do impulsive things. and it makes me think too much. and it makes me feel upset easily. sometimes when im upset, i'll think about the reason, and i realise that the reason is particularly dumb. its just those stupid stuff. ><
you affect me particularly so.
anyway, i just dont understand the whole thing about love. what's so great about it? i think its just overrated. i crave for love myself, every human being does, but i believe that true love doesnt exist. the feeling will fade away. only the commitment is left, and how long this commitment can last depends on the willpower of the individuals. of course, sometimes i wonder how it feels like to find your right one. a person to love, and trust, and to love you. its really sweet isnt it. but with happiness comes troubles, happiness doesnt last. and anyway what makes a relationship strong is the trials that the couple has gone through. i dont believe in true love without quarrels and whatnot. that's just plain puppy love. hmm, sometimes i wonder if i will ever find true love. i guess not. and although im hoping that i will find true love, it wouldnt affect me much if i dont find it. i'm a realistic person, although i do admit i am a romantic at heart. ah how conflicting. hmm, what will come will come i guess. no point rushing into things.
i believe in you. i know i do mean something to you.
so weird why am i talking about L-O-V-E? im supposed to be heartless, or as some people call it, have a heart of steel. hahaha. but then, a really strong fire can still melt steel you know. (: a really really really strong one. (: you will be able to melt it. will you try?
jealousy is a really strong emotion. sometimes i wonder, what's wrong with feeling jealous? everybody feels jealous at some points. what's so bad about feeling jealous? its a sour feeling, but maybe acknowledging it may make you feel better? ah i dont know. i do admit that i keep getting jealous recently, shant say about what. but its a feeling that really manifests quite frequently nowadays. hope it stops soon, cause it doesnt feel good =X its all bec
ause of you.
ah i think im quite possessive. and attention seeking. ): i dont like.
esp when it comes to you.
oh my love language's touch! (: so people, if you wanna make me feel loved, give me more hugs:D guys and girls are all welcome! hahaha, but dont anyhow touch la. that applies for both guys and girls (you never know what girls can do =/). heh. you make me feel so safe and warm when you hug me. that's when i started loving hugs.
i dont like having my emotions control me, but it does pretty much. this is so shit. teenage hood. hormones. EURGH.
i really really really have to learn to cherish. esp when it comes to you.
and be forgiving.
would you still love me in the morning?
forever and ever, babe.
i miss our old times.
you know im such a fool for you.
Friday, October 20, 2006
hello people!
uh, so got back the rest of the results today.
hmm, 4As and 3Cs. sighh.
what extremes man.
lang arts; 59.6
ss; 56
bio; 74.5
im really such a science person.
can i just fast forward to j1? den can skip all the ss and langarts part and all that. AHH. siann!
ok nevermind, i went to dhs after school. dhschoir was.. erm. yeah its not very good. the members a bit.. i feel like saying some things. but shant say. oh well, all i can say is, JIAYOU choir!
uhhuh went with sherry to eat. talked a bit la. and i waited 20+ mins for 67. with my super heavy bag. eurgh. super tired now. there's choir tmr. maybe i'll sleep early.
hmm. i wanna watch GONG! its such a nice show. SHIN is super cool, super cute. whee i love him mans! ((:
im looking forward to choir tmr. hope it'll be fun. il coro's quite nice to sing, and i wanna do the musical songs! yep quite fun all the choreo, and i wanna do carols! whee. ((:
ok im trying to be happy. yepyep. dont worry be happy!
uh, so got back the rest of the results today.
hmm, 4As and 3Cs. sighh.
what extremes man.
lang arts; 59.6
ss; 56
bio; 74.5
im really such a science person.
can i just fast forward to j1? den can skip all the ss and langarts part and all that. AHH. siann!
ok nevermind, i went to dhs after school. dhschoir was.. erm. yeah its not very good. the members a bit.. i feel like saying some things. but shant say. oh well, all i can say is, JIAYOU choir!
uhhuh went with sherry to eat. talked a bit la. and i waited 20+ mins for 67. with my super heavy bag. eurgh. super tired now. there's choir tmr. maybe i'll sleep early.
hmm. i wanna watch GONG! its such a nice show. SHIN is super cool, super cute. whee i love him mans! ((:
im looking forward to choir tmr. hope it'll be fun. il coro's quite nice to sing, and i wanna do the musical songs! yep quite fun all the choreo, and i wanna do carols! whee. ((:
ok im trying to be happy. yepyep. dont worry be happy!
Thursday, October 19, 2006
hello everyone (:
ok so today wasnt exactly the best. but it was meaningful nonetheless. yep so the first lesson was CT, it was really meaningful, and it basically summarized all that ive learnt in the IP. i really think that im very priviledged to be in the IP, and to know all these amazing people in my class. sure, there are some people in the cohort that i dont like, but i really do like my class, and im really happy with how things are in class now. we're all nice people and i think we're starting to enjoy the times spent with each other(: we still have one more year together, so people, let's all cherish the times we have left (: yes and then mr boy asked us to affirm some people in the class, yes and i think that it was really meaningful that we are able to recognize each other's strengths and everything. yes. (:
ok after that we went for 'parent trap', which is a theatre forum. uhhuh it was fun(: the warming up sessions were fun. hahaha all the running around and screaming etc. it was really fun! oosh. so after that it was the play. it was cool la, the actors were good, so convincing (: but that daughter was really too rude. yeah but the issues that she was facing were just about the same as mine, just that im not so rude. yeah. hmm guowei's performance was really entertaining. hahaha. yes and i see a likeness between lemuel and yiling. haha they're both so calm! yep.
after that was a talk by some weird speaker. so i hardly listened, was basically sleeping la. my eyes were closing x.x yep. was telling alicea about my family. she was quite shocked, hahaha. 'ive never seen someone who has so little trust in her family.' hmm i dint know i gave her that impression, seriously im fine with my family, just that the tone i use when talking about them isnt very nice. but that's just the way i was brought up la. yep. im fine with my family really.
yep and then there was a break. we were spending some time with the prc scholars analysing the juniors. hahaha. so interesting we're already bitching about them, oops. hahaha. shant say more =/
yeah after that was chem igniculus. hahaha it was retarded la. and then we got back our chem results.
cohort average: 57
no. of distinctions: 21
mean grade for v11: 3.9
mean grade for v12: 5++
mean grade for v13: 5.o
mean grade for v14: 4.5
so cool. 06v11 did the best again. omg it sounds so bigheaded, but we're really smart (: hahaha. i love 06v11! i heard we did the best overall too. owned physics and owned chem. hope we own bio and langarts too. lol and let's hope we dont disappoint ms toh again. =/ oh well. tmr will be a big day. oh i got 69 anyway, if anyone's interested.
uhhuh went to disturb my sister and her 'boyfriend'. LOL, super interesting.
ok so anyway i went home and then i practised il coro. its quite easy actually. x.x but im scared that when it comes to combined we'll not be able to get our note again. bloops. four/five people nia. cannot rely on anyone. poo. yeah but im looking forward to choir pracs. i wanna SING (:
yeah tmr gotta go school early. must reach by 0715. so irritating. blah. and im going back to dhs tmr. yep. hope rhoda's well now. take care dearie, i know you wont see this, but please get well soon (:
ok so today wasnt exactly the best. but it was meaningful nonetheless. yep so the first lesson was CT, it was really meaningful, and it basically summarized all that ive learnt in the IP. i really think that im very priviledged to be in the IP, and to know all these amazing people in my class. sure, there are some people in the cohort that i dont like, but i really do like my class, and im really happy with how things are in class now. we're all nice people and i think we're starting to enjoy the times spent with each other(: we still have one more year together, so people, let's all cherish the times we have left (: yes and then mr boy asked us to affirm some people in the class, yes and i think that it was really meaningful that we are able to recognize each other's strengths and everything. yes. (:
ok after that we went for 'parent trap', which is a theatre forum. uhhuh it was fun(: the warming up sessions were fun. hahaha all the running around and screaming etc. it was really fun! oosh. so after that it was the play. it was cool la, the actors were good, so convincing (: but that daughter was really too rude. yeah but the issues that she was facing were just about the same as mine, just that im not so rude. yeah. hmm guowei's performance was really entertaining. hahaha. yes and i see a likeness between lemuel and yiling. haha they're both so calm! yep.
after that was a talk by some weird speaker. so i hardly listened, was basically sleeping la. my eyes were closing x.x yep. was telling alicea about my family. she was quite shocked, hahaha. 'ive never seen someone who has so little trust in her family.' hmm i dint know i gave her that impression, seriously im fine with my family, just that the tone i use when talking about them isnt very nice. but that's just the way i was brought up la. yep. im fine with my family really.
yep and then there was a break. we were spending some time with the prc scholars analysing the juniors. hahaha. so interesting we're already bitching about them, oops. hahaha. shant say more =/
yeah after that was chem igniculus. hahaha it was retarded la. and then we got back our chem results.
cohort average: 57
no. of distinctions: 21
mean grade for v11: 3.9
mean grade for v12: 5++
mean grade for v13: 5.o
mean grade for v14: 4.5
so cool. 06v11 did the best again. omg it sounds so bigheaded, but we're really smart (: hahaha. i love 06v11! i heard we did the best overall too. owned physics and owned chem. hope we own bio and langarts too. lol and let's hope we dont disappoint ms toh again. =/ oh well. tmr will be a big day. oh i got 69 anyway, if anyone's interested.
uhhuh went to disturb my sister and her 'boyfriend'. LOL, super interesting.
ok so anyway i went home and then i practised il coro. its quite easy actually. x.x but im scared that when it comes to combined we'll not be able to get our note again. bloops. four/five people nia. cannot rely on anyone. poo. yeah but im looking forward to choir pracs. i wanna SING (:
yeah tmr gotta go school early. must reach by 0715. so irritating. blah. and im going back to dhs tmr. yep. hope rhoda's well now. take care dearie, i know you wont see this, but please get well soon (:
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
hmm.
today, was kinda crap.
haha we were supposed to go treetop walk.
in the end there were just some briefings,
and we watched spirited away.
hahaha. haku and chihiro so sweet! (:
it's like we were awwing and awwing.
haha. too bad they werent together in the end ):
yep so school ended.
went to find rhoda and we had a nice talk,
for close to two hours. (:
we talked about practically everything.
haha, her problems,
my problems,
choir stuffs etc etc.
i love rhoda!
just feeling so glad that im still so close to her after a year (:
sistas rock!
uhhuh, went for choir after that.
the rehearsal for farewell assembly for mrs chan.
yep after that we finished learning il coro.
i wonder if its spelled correctly =/
anyway, point is,
i think soprani part is so cool.
haha. ok the learning part was easy.
but the singing part is quite difficult,
because there's only four of us (shuwei's helping contralti one),
we cant really catch our note.
esp when we come in after the contralti ones come in.
we're always flat
cos we cant catch the note.
x.x
but its quite fun singing sop1 range la.
hahah. easy to blast.
four people sound like MANY people.
lol! yeah, but since there are only four/five people.
i shall have to go and learn my part better.
yeah.
felt really tired after singing high notes for so long,
but tired in a satisfied sort of way (:
i think choir on sat will be cool.
sing the syf songs, and the musical songs,
and hopefully carols.
whee (x
went out with huping and yuting to eat.
went bedok bk. yep huping left soon after.
so i was just left with yuting, who (thankfully) didnt rape me.
hahaha.
talked quite a lot.
it was nice sharing stuffs with her too.
(:
uhhuh. so its like,
i talked a whole lot today.
feel better about lotsa stuff.
which is good i guess.
love my friends (:
yep getting back chem tmr.
i dont know what to expect.
oh i got 70% for chinese btw.
yeah.
anyway,
MR KOH IS LEAVING.
that is SERIOUSLY so saddening! ):
i like mr koh,
he's been a good ip head,
and a good teacher.
in fact,
he's one of the best teachers i've ever had.
i was looking forward to having him teach me again next year,
and he had to leave ):
ok maybe we should all be happy for him,
that he got a promotion,
but still,
i cant help feeling sad that i wont see him anymore.
he's like, the ICON of VIP.
vip will be different without him.
sigh. ohwell,
mr koh, all the best!
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
hmm.
got back a few of my results.
ok only two.
so irritating,
lol one paper per day.
its like, killing me!
all the anticipation and everything.
bleah.
wanna know my results?
i dont mind sharing.
lol two extremes, x.x
physics: 146/180 (81%)
maths: 54/100
oh well.
chinese tmr, hope i dont screw up.
and the treetop walk is like, postponed.
because of the dumb haze.
how sad! ):
oh well i wonder what we're gonna do tmr.
there's choir tmr.
i dont mind.
haha.
i kinda like learning the new syf song.
cos the soprani part is easy compared to the contralti I part
heh.
im heng.
uhhuh.
been tearing myself up these few days.
im wondering,
if you even care.
if you knew that i was sad,
would you even show any concern.
well, i know you wouldnt.
i know you too well.
but i just cant help hoping.
and its because of this that gets me hurt
and sad, again and again.
oh well.
this sucks .
you ruined everything.
once again, dont's bother asking me people (:
i wanna go out with my friends!
2b, sistas, sexyfam etc etc.
argh but no time. x.x
got back a few of my results.
ok only two.
so irritating,
lol one paper per day.
its like, killing me!
all the anticipation and everything.
bleah.
wanna know my results?
i dont mind sharing.
lol two extremes, x.x
physics: 146/180 (81%)
maths: 54/100
oh well.
chinese tmr, hope i dont screw up.
and the treetop walk is like, postponed.
because of the dumb haze.
how sad! ):
oh well i wonder what we're gonna do tmr.
there's choir tmr.
i dont mind.
haha.
i kinda like learning the new syf song.
cos the soprani part is easy compared to the contralti I part
heh.
im heng.
uhhuh.
been tearing myself up these few days.
im wondering,
if you even care.
if you knew that i was sad,
would you even show any concern.
well, i know you wouldnt.
i know you too well.
but i just cant help hoping.
and its because of this that gets me hurt
and sad, again and again.
oh well.
this sucks .
you ruined everything.
once again, dont's bother asking me people (:
i wanna go out with my friends!
2b, sistas, sexyfam etc etc.
argh but no time. x.x
Sunday, October 15, 2006
was looking at all those vjchoir photos i have.
felt a wave of nostalgia.
hmm, we've really spent so much time together.
good and bad.
and looking at the many events,
woah.
there was seamoe, sov, sco, singapore idol. etc etc.
and those fun times when we went out,
the siglap concert, choir treat, choir bbq.
its funny how we transform from people who barely knew each other,
to such close friends now.
and thinking about it,
they really are the people whom i can trust.
love them (:
haha all those past thingys that we had.
like the temporary choir family,
the big hooha about my eyecandy,
and my lipcandy hahaha.
and all those scandals.
hahaha so fun! (:
i love vjchoir.
we really are a bunch of funloving people.
yes and we all care for each other dont we.
regardless of what others say, those outsiders who are not in vjchoir,
i still believe that vjchoir is a big family.
and our choir anthem really holds true to us. (:
i'll really miss these people when they graduate.
sigh,
shant think about it.
enjoy the times with them now! (:
i realised ive kinda neglected them.
and forgotten about how much i depended on them.
i feel like such an ingrate.
shall always remember how much they mean to me.
haha its always like that, when you spend too much time with someone
you tend to neglect them and forget about how much they mean to you.
i love you all.
thanks for everything:D
vjchoir rocks! (:
Friday, October 13, 2006
HELLO PEOPLE.
there was farewell assembly in the morning.
hmm not very sad la.
but still,
its a bit sad to know that the year twos are graduating already.
):
oh well.
and next year it'll be yuting them's turn already. x.x
that's damn sad.
):
farewell assembly was cool though.
i realised vj has a damn lame sense of humor.
haha.
but it's still cool la. (:
im happy today.
i talked to lotsa people during choir,
all those people whom i dont normally talk to.
and im happy really (:
well our rehearsal was bad.
like super bad.
we were flat and then we were sharp hahaha.
interesting.
i think its really time to buck up.
we havent been at our best ever since italy.
and we really needa sing well to show everyone,
that we ARE vjchoir.
yeap.
(:
uhhuh,
so im kinda happy cos i talked alot and was kinda high.
and like i said,
i really like the sopsies (:
yeah actually i like choir people.
all so funny and nice.
yeah after that we went to david's hse.
did nothing much there la.
DEE or D the dog was super funny la.
kinda cowardly hahaha.
but he's still cute (:
and dawnie and me were fondling it hahaha.
we took DEE out for a walk.
and we went to the playground.
i kinda just sat at the swing,
and stoned,
and got a bit emo.
haha. but it dint really affect my mood la (:
went back to david's house and i was
REALLY tired.
huping them went to play monopoly
and yizha oliver sx and their friend, soo played xbox that soccer game thingy.
i was just too tired to play.
and my shoulders were aching.
so i played neither.
and just sat there and watched them play the soccer thing.
yeah den i played one round.
haha oliver says im not bad for a girl!
(: waha so song.
uhhuh.
and huping david sindhu and dawnie were like going crazy over monopoly haha.
bargaining and trading like a bunch of AUNTIES.
haha i watched them and was laughing like shit. lol!
crazy people la them (:
uhhuh den i kinda just fell asleep.
really tired.
lol after that we went home.
oliver yizha huping and me went to eat.
ok technically its just oliver yizha me eating.
huping was nice and accompanied us (:
THANKS HUPING.
second time le. ((:
yeah talked and gossiped and ate.
waha.
not too bad.
it was fun.
eat sumo house.
(:
uhhuh.
i love choir people (:
tmr will be cool la.
though tiring.
hahaha.
i wanna go out at like 12plus. after the choir performance.
haha. hope we dont screw up.
vjchoir rules ((:
there was farewell assembly in the morning.
hmm not very sad la.
but still,
its a bit sad to know that the year twos are graduating already.
):
oh well.
and next year it'll be yuting them's turn already. x.x
that's damn sad.
):
farewell assembly was cool though.
i realised vj has a damn lame sense of humor.
haha.
but it's still cool la. (:
im happy today.
i talked to lotsa people during choir,
all those people whom i dont normally talk to.
and im happy really (:
well our rehearsal was bad.
like super bad.
we were flat and then we were sharp hahaha.
interesting.
i think its really time to buck up.
we havent been at our best ever since italy.
and we really needa sing well to show everyone,
that we ARE vjchoir.
yeap.
(:
uhhuh,
so im kinda happy cos i talked alot and was kinda high.
and like i said,
i really like the sopsies (:
yeah actually i like choir people.
all so funny and nice.
yeah after that we went to david's hse.
did nothing much there la.
DEE or D the dog was super funny la.
kinda cowardly hahaha.
but he's still cute (:
and dawnie and me were fondling it hahaha.
we took DEE out for a walk.
and we went to the playground.
i kinda just sat at the swing,
and stoned,
and got a bit emo.
haha. but it dint really affect my mood la (:
went back to david's house and i was
REALLY tired.
huping them went to play monopoly
and yizha oliver sx and their friend, soo played xbox that soccer game thingy.
i was just too tired to play.
and my shoulders were aching.
so i played neither.
and just sat there and watched them play the soccer thing.
yeah den i played one round.
haha oliver says im not bad for a girl!
(: waha so song.
uhhuh.
and huping david sindhu and dawnie were like going crazy over monopoly haha.
bargaining and trading like a bunch of AUNTIES.
haha i watched them and was laughing like shit. lol!
crazy people la them (:
uhhuh den i kinda just fell asleep.
really tired.
lol after that we went home.
oliver yizha huping and me went to eat.
ok technically its just oliver yizha me eating.
huping was nice and accompanied us (:
THANKS HUPING.
second time le. ((:
yeah talked and gossiped and ate.
waha.
not too bad.
it was fun.
eat sumo house.
(:
uhhuh.
i love choir people (:
tmr will be cool la.
though tiring.
hahaha.
i wanna go out at like 12plus. after the choir performance.
haha. hope we dont screw up.
vjchoir rules ((:
Thursday, October 12, 2006
he wasnt mine to lose.
and now the night is near
and i can make believe he's here.
**
uhh im getting emo.
my heart is like breaking into a million pieces.
uh.
i dont like this.
ok so today was rather boring.
i did a bit of cross stitch.
haha leftover stuff from last year.
yep and then my sister came home,
we decided to go out and eat something good.
hahaha.
so we went out.
ate pastamania in the end x.x
so much for eating something good.
hahaha.
yep and she bought a shirt for me (:
from pink industrie.
i think pink industrie clothes are REALLY so nice.
hahaha.
i like the shorts, and the skirt.
and the shirts.
and the bags.
and the shoes.
uh everything!
and its 50% off storewide.
someone buy me the whole shop please.
lol. yeah so my sis bought a shirt for me.
dont think that she so nice la,
its my long overdue birthday present haha.
yep (:
so we came home.
yah just like that lor.
hahahaha.
sian.
my day passed in boringness.
LOL.
ok and heartbreak.
bah whatever.
people dont come and ask me.
i wont say hahaha.
**
you were never mine to lose
and im just staring at you
wondering if you will notice me.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
oosh.
im happy today! (:
ok so as a continuation of my post just now,
jingjing and me decided to go to the library(:
guai muggers we are.
lol.
read books (:
and i borrowed some voice book,
and the whole series of the chronicles of narnia.
WOOTS. (:
super cool.
im finally able to read in peace!
yippee yay.
uhhuh so we spent a long time reading.
and then we went to eat.
yep just me and jingjing.
alone in our world.
so romantic.
LOL!
yeah.
soon, the lit people finished their exams.
and they were ecstatic hahaha.
screaming and jumping around like a bunch of monkeys.
lol. well they are anyway. =P
yeap and den most of us left for haagen daz!
met some of the rest at esplanade.
haha.
so there was a total of around 21people.
which is good,
cos that's two-thirds of the class.
yeah.
i sat with the girls! (:
puen, debby, jolyn, yiling,
alicea, althea, jingjing, jiemin.
yeah we shared two fondues.
super cool ok.
the fondues are SO NICE!
omg eat until SONG. (:
yesyes it was nice!
there were cookies, and wafers,
and fruits, and different flavours of icecream,
and nuts and woots it was all so nice! (:
yeah and den we stuffed ourselves until we were full haha.
and then we played zong ji mi ma.
and made the chocolate semi harden.
haha. can you imagine how torturous it is,
to eat some semi hardened chocolate,
which looked like shit,
when we are alr like,
scarily full. LOL.
yes. haha. but it was rather fun luh.
and then we played a short round of 'i never'.
haha the scandalous stuff were coming out.
but we hada leave.
ah sad ): hahaha.
yeah so went to esplanade library.
and then i found another book on vocal techniques (:
yeah.
and then, they decided to go to watch world trade center.
haha.
which is sad cos i dont get to go ):
because my retarded father insisted on me going home. argh.
nvm shant get pissed because of that.
but all in all, imma happy girl today!
exams are finally over,
and i had a fun time going out with my class (:
really glad for that.
the girls are all so nice!
(:
i think my class got more united through the exams.
haha what irony.
heh.
uhhuh speaking of world trade centre,
huping them are going to watch today too.
so irritating.
now everybody go and watch le,
nobody to pei me alr ):
yeah, lol.
oosh speaking of choir,
WE'RE HAVING CHOIR AT SIGLAP TMR.
can you imagine how happy i am?
(((:
its been ages since we've been to siglap!
i love siglap. yay!
uhhuh.
im sick of going to school anyway.
haha. maybe i shall mug my scores later.
work hard for choir later wheehee.
siglap makes me think that we're REALLY having a practice.
cos all the practices held in school are quite crap anyway.
haha.
im excited for choir pracs!
i can finally sing in peace now.
wahaha with out all the worries for exams.
yeahhh. (:
uhhuh speaking of all the post exams activities,
i realised i have quite a lot of stuff going on.
1) meeting up with the sistas.
im happy today! (:
ok so as a continuation of my post just now,
jingjing and me decided to go to the library(:
guai muggers we are.
lol.
read books (:
and i borrowed some voice book,
and the whole series of the chronicles of narnia.
WOOTS. (:
super cool.
im finally able to read in peace!
yippee yay.
uhhuh so we spent a long time reading.
and then we went to eat.
yep just me and jingjing.
alone in our world.
so romantic.
LOL!
yeah.
soon, the lit people finished their exams.
and they were ecstatic hahaha.
screaming and jumping around like a bunch of monkeys.
lol. well they are anyway. =P
yeap and den most of us left for haagen daz!
met some of the rest at esplanade.
haha.
so there was a total of around 21people.
which is good,
cos that's two-thirds of the class.
yeah.
i sat with the girls! (:
puen, debby, jolyn, yiling,
alicea, althea, jingjing, jiemin.
yeah we shared two fondues.
super cool ok.
the fondues are SO NICE!
omg eat until SONG. (:
yesyes it was nice!
there were cookies, and wafers,
and fruits, and different flavours of icecream,
and nuts and woots it was all so nice! (:
yeah and den we stuffed ourselves until we were full haha.
and then we played zong ji mi ma.
and made the chocolate semi harden.
haha. can you imagine how torturous it is,
to eat some semi hardened chocolate,
which looked like shit,
when we are alr like,
scarily full. LOL.
yes. haha. but it was rather fun luh.
and then we played a short round of 'i never'.
haha the scandalous stuff were coming out.
but we hada leave.
ah sad ): hahaha.
yeah so went to esplanade library.
and then i found another book on vocal techniques (:
yeah.
and then, they decided to go to watch world trade center.
haha.
which is sad cos i dont get to go ):
because my retarded father insisted on me going home. argh.
nvm shant get pissed because of that.
but all in all, imma happy girl today!
exams are finally over,
and i had a fun time going out with my class (:
really glad for that.
the girls are all so nice!
(:
i think my class got more united through the exams.
haha what irony.
heh.
uhhuh speaking of world trade centre,
huping them are going to watch today too.
so irritating.
now everybody go and watch le,
nobody to pei me alr ):
yeah, lol.
oosh speaking of choir,
WE'RE HAVING CHOIR AT SIGLAP TMR.
can you imagine how happy i am?
(((:
its been ages since we've been to siglap!
i love siglap. yay!
uhhuh.
im sick of going to school anyway.
haha. maybe i shall mug my scores later.
work hard for choir later wheehee.
siglap makes me think that we're REALLY having a practice.
cos all the practices held in school are quite crap anyway.
haha.
im excited for choir pracs!
i can finally sing in peace now.
wahaha with out all the worries for exams.
yeahhh. (:
uhhuh speaking of all the post exams activities,
i realised i have quite a lot of stuff going on.
1) meeting up with the sistas.
2) meeting up with the sexy fam.
3) meeting up with sj fee them.
4) going cycling with the triplets (i hope)
5) going to althea's hse for the disney princess movie marathon
6) going out with the girls in my class (if there are any more outings)
7) choir pracs!
uhhuh. and some stuff that i wanna do for myself now that ive got more time.
8) read.
9) improve on my singing.
10) improve on my maths and chem and physics.
11) finish my last year's cross stitching.
12) tidy up my table.
13) tidy up my study area.
yes and goodness knows what else.
im looking forward to meeting my friends! (:
whoots i shall go and read the chronicles now.
yes and mug my choir scores.
imma responsible choir member wahahaha.
i got something BIG to announce.
I AM FREE! (:
langarts paper was easy.
haha.
i finished sections A,B and C in one hour.
den i took my time for section D.
hahaha.
so interesting.
ok at least the exams ended on a good note.
hope my results come back ok.
lol chem is screwed.
but i dont care.
because everyone else screwed too.
i think mr shi is cute,
he set the whole paper on chewing gum.
haha. (:
oh.
the tags on my tagboard,im lazy to reply.
haha. but thanks people anyway (:
i love you guys (:
now we're waiting for the lit people to finish their exams,
and we've got nothing to do now.
sigh.
SO SIAN!
anyway,
im sudden excited for carolling!
its gonna be SO SO SO fun! (:
hahaha.
my enthu ness all come back liao.
oosh. and i love the sopsies too!
we're so nice people(:
debbie;
lydia;
juitlian;
jasmine;
kenny;
isabelle;
yvonne;
francesca;
he li;
shuwei;
yuting;
yay i love all of you (:
seriously i think the sopsies are all nice people!
i used to be biased against some of them,
but not anymore!
ok im looking forward to all those choir practices,
it'll be fun yeah people ((:
YAY.
i like my class too.
haagen daz, at long last.
woots! (:
ok so my life is going fine now,
just for that particular aspect.
ah shant think about it.
shant display my EMO-ness.
yeah.
happy happy! (:
yay.
happy but sian.
lol cos i dunno what to do now.
x.x
maybe can go back dhs. haha.
let's see first. (:
I AM FREE! (:
langarts paper was easy.
haha.
i finished sections A,B and C in one hour.
den i took my time for section D.
hahaha.
so interesting.
ok at least the exams ended on a good note.
hope my results come back ok.
lol chem is screwed.
but i dont care.
because everyone else screwed too.
i think mr shi is cute,
he set the whole paper on chewing gum.
haha. (:
oh.
the tags on my tagboard,im lazy to reply.
haha. but thanks people anyway (:
i love you guys (:
now we're waiting for the lit people to finish their exams,
and we've got nothing to do now.
sigh.
SO SIAN!
anyway,
im sudden excited for carolling!
its gonna be SO SO SO fun! (:
hahaha.
my enthu ness all come back liao.
oosh. and i love the sopsies too!
we're so nice people(:
debbie;
lydia;
juitlian;
jasmine;
kenny;
isabelle;
yvonne;
francesca;
he li;
shuwei;
yuting;
yay i love all of you (:
seriously i think the sopsies are all nice people!
i used to be biased against some of them,
but not anymore!
ok im looking forward to all those choir practices,
it'll be fun yeah people ((:
YAY.
i like my class too.
haagen daz, at long last.
woots! (:
ok so my life is going fine now,
just for that particular aspect.
ah shant think about it.
shant display my EMO-ness.
yeah.
happy happy! (:
yay.
happy but sian.
lol cos i dunno what to do now.
x.x
maybe can go back dhs. haha.
let's see first. (:
Saturday, October 07, 2006
went out with the triplets to study today.
it was fun!
(:
i am happy.
the only thing is that im always worrying about my exams.
sigh.
3 more days.
to liberation.
but somehow that liberation doesnt really feel good?
because i know i've flopped my exams.
sigh.
i wish i could do well.
and get good results.
i know i wont.
and im starting to get REALLY worried for chem.
and LA.
i read through my past tests,
and i wonder,
how did i manage to come up with these answers?
cos the answers i write now are totally different.
sigh.
ok i feel like getting a private blog.
shall get one now.
although i know i wont write in it much.
LOL.
i've got nothing much to hide what.
im a very open person yay (:
yes as i was saying,
today was fun!
i miss the triplets!
and it was really nice going to study with them.
like how we used to in july/august that time.
haha.
its been a few months since ive known them.
i mean, wayne and xianyong.
ive know rayrin since, erm sec1? LOL.
so fast! soon they'll be leaving vj.
and going ns ):
that's sad.
but nevermind,
i shall enjoy the times when i still have them with me(:
they're so crap.
haha. and always bullying me.
but im glad everything's fine between us all now (:
YAY.
i shall try my best for chem on mon.
there's nothing much i can do now.
i think i'll still continue working hard after exams.
i wanna pull up my socks for maths.
anyway i should be studying maths since i gotta take r papers anyway.
hmm.
that's such a sad thing.
i have so much to get off my chest.
but i realise i cant say all these here.
so ciao people (:
oh ya.
the haze ah.
my god.
can die!
my throat felt so dry after coming home.
and my eyes hurt.
all indonesia's fault la!
go burn forest for what!
okok bye people! (:
it was fun!
(:
i am happy.
the only thing is that im always worrying about my exams.
sigh.
3 more days.
to liberation.
but somehow that liberation doesnt really feel good?
because i know i've flopped my exams.
sigh.
i wish i could do well.
and get good results.
i know i wont.
and im starting to get REALLY worried for chem.
and LA.
i read through my past tests,
and i wonder,
how did i manage to come up with these answers?
cos the answers i write now are totally different.
sigh.
ok i feel like getting a private blog.
shall get one now.
although i know i wont write in it much.
LOL.
i've got nothing much to hide what.
im a very open person yay (:
yes as i was saying,
today was fun!
i miss the triplets!
and it was really nice going to study with them.
like how we used to in july/august that time.
haha.
its been a few months since ive known them.
i mean, wayne and xianyong.
ive know rayrin since, erm sec1? LOL.
so fast! soon they'll be leaving vj.
and going ns ):
that's sad.
but nevermind,
i shall enjoy the times when i still have them with me(:
they're so crap.
haha. and always bullying me.
but im glad everything's fine between us all now (:
YAY.
i shall try my best for chem on mon.
there's nothing much i can do now.
i think i'll still continue working hard after exams.
i wanna pull up my socks for maths.
anyway i should be studying maths since i gotta take r papers anyway.
hmm.
that's such a sad thing.
i have so much to get off my chest.
but i realise i cant say all these here.
so ciao people (:
oh ya.
the haze ah.
my god.
can die!
my throat felt so dry after coming home.
and my eyes hurt.
all indonesia's fault la!
go burn forest for what!
okok bye people! (:
Friday, October 06, 2006
back for my third post.
haha i saw sj's tag,
and i remember that i used to leech off chinese.
haha. all those little little stuff.
i forgot already.
glad to have my memory refreshed (:
i cant wait to meet up with the 2b peeps!
den we can talk about the past.
and talk about all the funny things that we've done. (:
i miss the 2b people!
oh anyway.
i wanted to say.
LILY'S DYING.
oh that's my rabbit anyway.
i dont mention her much cos i dont really touch her a lot.
last time i carried her when she was a baby,
and she scratched me.
from then on i never carry her le.
never really touch her also.
guess im quite a bad owner.
but still,
im quite sad that she's dying.
last time she was fat and everything.
now she's like, skin and bones.
dunno what's happening to her.
she's only 3yrs old!
omg she's dying a premature death.
rabbits are supposed to live till 8yrs old or something.
ohk so maybe she dint really recieve a lot of care from me.
and i dint exactly let her out to play too.
just kept her inside her cage all the time.
guess those muscles of hers didnt get any exercise.
so it shrunk or something.
that's why her legs are so weird now.
sighh.
but i really dint know what to do.
cos i dint exactly love her.
and last time had to keep feeding her,
and changing her bedding.
so irritating and irksome.
was kinda wishing for her to die.
now that she's dying,
i feel kinda sad.
its like im just waiting for her to die anyday now.
she so poor thing.
x.x
my whole family is blaming me for her condition now.
they say i never take care of her properly.
and say i very heartless.
wth its my rabbit leh,
i more xin tong than them la.
i just never show only mah!
and what's done is done alr what.
what they want me to do?
chop off my legs and give her ah?
cant stand it when they keep saying me about lily.
i dint wish for this to happen too right.
hai.
im kinda having mixed feelings too.
i want her to die so she wont have to keep suffering.
its quite saddening to see her so xin ku everyday.
but i'll be sad if she dies.
ha i wont cry.
but i'll be sad.
sigh.
my rabbit leh.
LILY.
sigh.
rest in peace.
my sister's in lurve!
hahahaha.
i have such a whale of a time suaning her everyday.
cos she goes out to study with *ahem* him everyday.
hahaha.
she says they only like each other,
but that's all.
haha but to me that's enough.
they're considered together already.
and she says no, cos they havent held hands.
like wth? there's no need to hold hands what.
what matters is that they know they like each other right?
LOL.
so weird.
yeah its fun to suan her man.
hahahaha.
everytime she comes home i get so much fun.
haha. hope she doesnt get hurt or something.
love isnt something to play around with. =/
mm,
think its quite stupid for people to keep holding on to it.
move on. haha.
i know i will if i were in such a position.
but then again,
ive never been deeply in love before.
hah so i wouldnt know.
but still.
as an outsider,
these types of things arh.
haha.
quite stupid to me.
i laugh when i see it.
ok nvm random rantings.
but still,
MY SISTER'S IN LOVE!
hahaha.
hope she doesnt see this,
if not she'll kill me. hahaha.
hahahaha.
i have such a whale of a time suaning her everyday.
cos she goes out to study with *ahem* him everyday.
hahaha.
she says they only like each other,
but that's all.
haha but to me that's enough.
they're considered together already.
and she says no, cos they havent held hands.
like wth? there's no need to hold hands what.
what matters is that they know they like each other right?
LOL.
so weird.
yeah its fun to suan her man.
hahahaha.
everytime she comes home i get so much fun.
haha. hope she doesnt get hurt or something.
love isnt something to play around with. =/
mm,
think its quite stupid for people to keep holding on to it.
move on. haha.
i know i will if i were in such a position.
but then again,
ive never been deeply in love before.
hah so i wouldnt know.
but still.
as an outsider,
these types of things arh.
haha.
quite stupid to me.
i laugh when i see it.
ok nvm random rantings.
but still,
MY SISTER'S IN LOVE!
hahaha.
hope she doesnt see this,
if not she'll kill me. hahaha.
this time its gone,
never feel the same.
but we had some good times,
guess its sad just the same.
**
exams have started.
i screwed everything up.
ok so let's see;
mon; lang arts paper1 and 2. (screwed la. but i did my best.)
chinese paper 1 (not screwed, but you'll never know what can happen)
tues; social studies (comfirm screwed)
wed; biology (the paper that i wanted to do well for, and yet i screwed it up)
chinese paper2 (it was fine, but then again, you'll never know)
thurs; physics (screwed)
physics practical (i went to change my answers. x.x so its screwed too)
fri; maths. (TOTALLY SCREWED. its the paper i HAD to pass. and i screwed it up.)
HELLO MATHS R PAPER (:
nice to meet you!
zzz.
what's bloody wrong with me?
i studied so hard.
and its all going down the drain.
i wanted to prove to my daddy that im putting in effort for my studies too.
not just for choir.
and now i cant.
and he can just keep suaning me about choir.
ARGH.
i want a high overall grade.
but its gone now.
hello to low grades.
bye to high grades.
what happened to that may from dhs?
this sucks.
i thought i did alright.
see now i dint.
and even when i play,
i'll just be thinking,
play so hard for what, you didnt do well.
sigh.
i feel so inferior,
esp when it comes to maths.
i really wanted to do well for maths.
i needed the pass.
guess im failing it.
ah.
hello r papers (:
zzz.
i wanted to do well for bio.
i thought i could.
and guess what?
hello mr thermophillic bacteria.
and there, my results,
gone down the drain.
ah.
i know you must be thinking,
nevermind la,
next time work harder lor.
but then,
i think nobody knows how much these results mean to me.
and how much i need to get good grades.
so dont bother trying to console me.
yall are just gonna say the wrong things anyway.
i feel stupid.
no wait.
i am stupid.
and i feel ugly.
stupid exams made all my pimples pop out.
my skin was never good,
but not THIS bad.
sigh.
im ugly.
fugly.
ah.
i kinda lost my passion for choir.
i lost my choral voice too.
im super airy now.
im disgusted when i hear myself sing.
yuck.
and yeah i havent been down to the stone tables this whole week.
mainly because i dint want to see somebody's face.
that disgusting piece of shit.
yeah.
so i havent seen the choir people for a long time.
rayrin asked me if i missed them,
i said no.
ha it was true.
harsh but true.
oh well.
i dont have that drive to sing anymore.
i dont have the drive to do anything anymore.
think i grew up over the exam period.
im like
tired of everything.
sigh.
my friendships.
they're all going down the drain.
esp this one,
which i treasured so much.
ah nvm.
i expected it.
since when have my friendships lasted very long?
ok maybe for the sistas and those dhs people yes.
but that's all.
ah nevermind. im spouting nonsense.
i think im a bad friend.
and i cant be bothered to be nice
and listen to my friend's rantings anymore.
i dont care anymore.
if my friend wants to be sad, emo or whatever.
i'll just let him/her be.
i dont really care.
i mean, its not like whatever i say will have any effect anyway.
it'll just make me feel inferior.
blah.
there's still chem and la paper 3.
im quite confident for la paper 3.
cos they're only stimulus questions.
ahha.
its when i get confident that i do badly.
guess im gonna screw it up again.
and chem.
mr shi said its gonna be easy.
den he added that the first question was quite hard.
which means it'll be tough.
see.
screwed again.
oh and our dearest mrs khet said that maths paper was easy.
'cannot fail one.'
those were her words.
and see.
im gonna fail.
i know i am.
and that physics teacher who invigilated us.
'dont worry la the paper's not that hard.'
yeah right.
see teachers cant be trusted.
eurgh.
**
i think i can say,
i dont want you anymore.
never feel the same.
but we had some good times,
guess its sad just the same.
**
exams have started.
i screwed everything up.
ok so let's see;
mon; lang arts paper1 and 2. (screwed la. but i did my best.)
chinese paper 1 (not screwed, but you'll never know what can happen)
tues; social studies (comfirm screwed)
wed; biology (the paper that i wanted to do well for, and yet i screwed it up)
chinese paper2 (it was fine, but then again, you'll never know)
thurs; physics (screwed)
physics practical (i went to change my answers. x.x so its screwed too)
fri; maths. (TOTALLY SCREWED. its the paper i HAD to pass. and i screwed it up.)
HELLO MATHS R PAPER (:
nice to meet you!
zzz.
what's bloody wrong with me?
i studied so hard.
and its all going down the drain.
i wanted to prove to my daddy that im putting in effort for my studies too.
not just for choir.
and now i cant.
and he can just keep suaning me about choir.
ARGH.
i want a high overall grade.
but its gone now.
hello to low grades.
bye to high grades.
what happened to that may from dhs?
this sucks.
i thought i did alright.
see now i dint.
and even when i play,
i'll just be thinking,
play so hard for what, you didnt do well.
sigh.
i feel so inferior,
esp when it comes to maths.
i really wanted to do well for maths.
i needed the pass.
guess im failing it.
ah.
hello r papers (:
zzz.
i wanted to do well for bio.
i thought i could.
and guess what?
hello mr thermophillic bacteria.
and there, my results,
gone down the drain.
ah.
i know you must be thinking,
nevermind la,
next time work harder lor.
but then,
i think nobody knows how much these results mean to me.
and how much i need to get good grades.
so dont bother trying to console me.
yall are just gonna say the wrong things anyway.
i feel stupid.
no wait.
i am stupid.
and i feel ugly.
stupid exams made all my pimples pop out.
my skin was never good,
but not THIS bad.
sigh.
im ugly.
fugly.
ah.
i kinda lost my passion for choir.
i lost my choral voice too.
im super airy now.
im disgusted when i hear myself sing.
yuck.
and yeah i havent been down to the stone tables this whole week.
mainly because i dint want to see somebody's face.
that disgusting piece of shit.
yeah.
so i havent seen the choir people for a long time.
rayrin asked me if i missed them,
i said no.
ha it was true.
harsh but true.
oh well.
i dont have that drive to sing anymore.
i dont have the drive to do anything anymore.
think i grew up over the exam period.
im like
tired of everything.
sigh.
my friendships.
they're all going down the drain.
esp this one,
which i treasured so much.
ah nvm.
i expected it.
since when have my friendships lasted very long?
ok maybe for the sistas and those dhs people yes.
but that's all.
ah nevermind. im spouting nonsense.
i think im a bad friend.
and i cant be bothered to be nice
and listen to my friend's rantings anymore.
i dont care anymore.
if my friend wants to be sad, emo or whatever.
i'll just let him/her be.
i dont really care.
i mean, its not like whatever i say will have any effect anyway.
it'll just make me feel inferior.
blah.
there's still chem and la paper 3.
im quite confident for la paper 3.
cos they're only stimulus questions.
ahha.
its when i get confident that i do badly.
guess im gonna screw it up again.
and chem.
mr shi said its gonna be easy.
den he added that the first question was quite hard.
which means it'll be tough.
see.
screwed again.
oh and our dearest mrs khet said that maths paper was easy.
'cannot fail one.'
those were her words.
and see.
im gonna fail.
i know i am.
and that physics teacher who invigilated us.
'dont worry la the paper's not that hard.'
yeah right.
see teachers cant be trusted.
eurgh.
**
i think i can say,
i dont want you anymore.
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