bleah ><

so, it has resorted to slamming each other on our blogs. if that's wad you want, fine.

i dont hate you. im just pissed, if you want to think i hate you, den go ahead. fine.

how do you expect me to tell you to your face. yeah you said 'would you mind?' wad did you expect me to say? 'yes i do mind'?! and besides, i think you knew i was pissed. i had to act as if nothing happened, if not the rest will feel so awkward. i told her that i wasnt going to affect the rest. i promised. so i had to act like nothing happened. and seriously, i wasnt angry yesterday already, just pissed. you know i dont fake. i can be polite, but i wont fake. you wont expect me to be hugging you when im still pissed.

yeah you went cos of your fren. and what about me? im a piece of shit? something that you dont even care for? yeah the rest had other things to do, but i didnt have. i know i shouldnt expect you to just give up everything for me. but look, you were the one who was organising the thing with me. if its not called pangseh then wad is it called?

besides, you PROMISED to go with me, i was the one who asked first. not your fren. you can say you are pangsehing your fren, but what about me?

i know your reasons. i know why you went there. she told me. i told her that i wont forgive you so soon. not so soon. but i will. you should know my 'sui bian ni la' you should know it wun mean anything good. wad was i supposed to say? 'NO I FORBID YOU TO GO!'? was i supposed to say that huh? what could i say?

i was looking so forward to that outing, but in the end everything was spoiled, everything fell apart. this shows i cant really rely on yall for anything. yeah i had fun with my classmates. i dont regret going out with them, but still its disappointing. you had let me down. if you werent comfirm going with me, you shouldnt have promised me.

and you said that i accused you, i dint. he WAS a factor of your decision. maybe not the final deciding one. but he afterall WAS a factor. and you know what? he knows that himself. no one told him anything, he just KNEW. i told him you were going there, and he said that he knew why. he said that it was cos of him. like please, even HE thinks that way. im not wrong to think that way too.

and you said that i din give you a chance to explain. i was online just now, i came to talk to you, you said that you didnt want to disturb me. so what's that? you were given the chance, you din bother to explain. you should have explained right from the start. and that day when we were walking together, you just acted sian, i waited for you to explain. you dint. and that's when i went home and wrote the previous entry. dont blame me for not giving you the chance. you din grab hold of it.

ytd, i waited the whole night for your call, your sms, what did you do? NOTHING.

i do love you too. that's all i can say. but i am pissed. you should know what to do. i wont eat you up. you know i wont. if you choose to leave me alone, then fine. things REALLY wont be the same anymore.